So tonight Tila tweeted and updated her Facebook, saying she was writing an "epic letter" to Lindsay Lohan.


Okay Tila, I'll bite.  I'm sure this isn't just another desperate clutch at fame and anybody more famous than you.  I mean, you've never done that before, right?

*CoughcoughCaseyJohnsoncoughcough*
*CoughcoughPerezHiltoncoughcough*
*CoughcoughTheGamecoughcough*
*CoughcoughRayJcoughcough*
*CoughcoughAMILLIONOTHERPEOPLEcoughcough*

Oh, excuse me, I had a little coughing fit there.  Ahem, where was I?  Oh yeah.  I'm sure Tila really means this!  Lindsay, Tila is your only hope!  She's totally what you need to restart your career!  Align yourself with what TMZ calls a "tragic trainwreck" and who Time Magazine named one of the 100 Least Influential People of 2010!  Yes, Lilo, Tila is the savior you've been waiting for!

Hey guys, remember not too long ago when E! made the comment about Tila and Lindsay getting together, and Tila thought it was serious and ran with it on twitter?  Making a total ass of herself?

Wow, can you say DELUSIONAL?  Come on, I know that you can.  So I dunno guys, do you think the super helpful open letter Tila is writing is like those tweets?  Or do you think it's like these tweets, taken from over a year ago?


Just sayin'.  (By the way, isn't it funny that Tila's answer is basically just like The Game's response to Tila?)

Tila, stop trying to get Lindsay Lohan's attention.  It just looks pathetic now and nobody in their right mind would take advice from you, unless it was on which corner drug dealer sells the best crack in Hollywood (that would be Hollywood Court on Yucca and Wilton...I mean NO I DON'T KNOW THAT, you bitches crazy), or how to completely ruin your career and become a Hollywood pariah.  Then, Tila, your advice would come in handy.  Just shut the fuck up and go back to bragging about your gossip blog that is going to dethrone Perez Hilton and change the world as we know it.  You know, the one that leaked the other day and everybody laughed at.  The one that is the biggest waste of time and energy since...oh, I dunno, your record label?

Lindsay, you got enough crazy in your life right now.  And Tila "I'm a meth-mouthed fuck-up" Tequila is not even qualified to judge you.  Once you start faking pregnancies for the publicity, then you might condescend to look her way.

I'm out, bitches!