Admittedly I don’t know too much about this guy. I know he’s the guy she always claims is her “personal paparazzi” and he takes a lot of photos of her wonky nips. I also heard he has worked or continues to work at TMZ, I couldn’t find anything to confirm that though.

Anyway, he was on my radar back in April when Tila and Casa had their big blowup at the airport on her way to the Skankzilla Press Tour in New York. Tila started tweeting about how she got rid of the ‘bad’ friend, and was now going to date the ‘good’ friend or some such nonsense. She followed with several tweets that seemed to indicate she and Garry would hit the Motel 6 sheets that night and he was her new boo, and went as far as to taunt Casa by naming Garry as her new lover.

At the time I didn’t buy the Garry Sun/Tila relationship. I figured it was just more talk to piss off Casa. Casa was suppose to be a friend of Garry’s and as I remember some bad blood went down between the two of them over Tila. Like I said, I’m not as familiar with Garry, as I am with Bradshaw and that billboard-size head of his, but in the back of my head thought he was a normal non-drama guy, so didn’t pay him too much mind.

After Tila fired Garry over Arm-MeetGate, I started paying attention to his tweets. He seemed very hurt by the firing, and particularly devastated when Tila started accusing him of harassment, Arm-MeetGate and other vile things she pulled out of her syphilitc alien brain. I tweeted him several times to offer support and try to get some answers from him about Tila but he wasn’t having any of it. He tweets these kinda spiritual haiku/zen poetry responses, and I got to tell ya, I’m just not that deep. I don’t get half the shit he says, and trying to read between the lines is next to impossible. I did encourage him to stand his ground and go after her, but I never got a definitive answer out of him whether he was going to go forward or not..

Rather than go apeshit all over Tila’s ass for the accusations, he got all philosophical and once again, I got all confuzzled, (then again, I can get lost in the deep messages in a bowl of AlphaBets cereal, so go figure). Anyway, I’ve been on the fence with Garry. I hope he nails her skank-ass to the floor, but he now appears to have mellowed and sadly, I won’t see Tila next to me in jelis hater jail, shackled to one of our many pedos, snacking on Cup O’Noodles and braiding each other’s hair. I do hope he slams her ass with a lawsuit for defamation of character and slander. He holds all the cards, and I hope he uses that power for good (suing Tila) and not evil (turning into a pansy-ass cowardly chickenshit).

But, we seem to have a new development.

Remember back in June when Tila was talking about having a couple of hot chicks over for a pillow fight with whipped cream? I got to wondering about that post, and wondered if that was actually the day she was filming her porn/sex tape, whatever the hell you want to call it. So, I went dumpster diving (in contrast to cum-dumpster diving, which is legally banned in 48 states). My dumpster diving brought up some interesting posts that I had forgotten about, but which pointed me in a new direction for a blog post (shiny pennies on the ground do that to me, as well).

One was Tila posting on the Flog a plea to her moron army to help her decide on a birthday gift for her “best friend”. That was on June 22. I had forgotten this little nugget, but decided it warranted further research. Why? Because I’m finding Tila often has a kernel of truth in her tweets/blogs. In that particular blog, she mentioned how the lucky young stud would have the option of unwrapping her *gag* as part of his celebration.

My first thought was Bradshaw. He may have a 9Head, and be a little gay, but hell, enough birthday hooch might turn any guy/gay into a raving Tila love machine. A quick Google search showed that he had a couple of birthday parties in February, because his birthday is around Valentine’s Day.

So, Bradshaw is out, that leaves me with Garry. Nothing on Google for Garry. Ugh. But wait, let’s check his Twitter. Oopsie, Twitter doesn’t make birthdays viewable….but Facebook does and SCORE! Guess when Garry’s birthday is (well, his birthday and what appears to be his multiple-STD day!). Yep, you guessed it, June 22.

I have to admit, I find it hard to believe that Garry would bang that  ratted-up hairspray-fuckbox (thank you uncle Eddie, for that perfect insult!). Garry certainly seems intelligent enough to bag a normal, high-functioning chick, but Tila? I mean, c’mon, that’s really scraping the bottom of the bottom of the barrel. I could see that nasty Casa hitting it, but Gary? I don’t know.

Then, several days after the birthday post, she posts about insecure men who whine like pussies because they don’t think they’re good enough to be with her *gag*. Could she and Garry have had a falling out of their own? Though this seems unlikely, because it’s another several weeks before she kicks him to the curb with the Arm Meet accusations. But note, she also accused him of sexual harassment against her staff, and we all know her staff consists of her and Bradshaw (please DO NOT let a 3-way amongst these mis-fits be the next leaked sex tape!)

Let’s back this wreck up just a smidge, ‘cause I need to point out the holes in her Arm Meet story. We now have 5 scenarios that Tila has admitted to in regards to Arm MeetGate:

1. Jane did it in a murderous rage

2. It was all a performance piece a’la Gaga

3. Tila was suicidal and tried to take her own life with a tacky-ass broken hooker lamp

4. Garry Sun did it

5. Her friend’s saber tooth tiger cat did it. (Poor Fluffy gets the short end of the stick. He oughta join Garry in that defamation suit!)

Ok, let’s haul this wreck back on track…

Could Tila and Garry have kept their relationship secret for 3 months without Tila flapping her gums and riding him while eating pizza? I can’t see her shutting her mouth (or legs) about anything, but if this Biff thing is real (and the jury is still out on that) is it possible Tila has finally learned *gasp* discretion? Tila bullshits about all this fake shit, but perhaps if it’s something or someone really important to her, she shuts her pie-hole.

Is Garry so blinded by the herpes miasma floating 3 inches above her twat, that he drank the KoolAid? I mean, if so, we have to give the guy credit. He lasted several months, whereas a psycho crazed stalking Biff lasted less than 2 weeks. But, then again, Garry kept his mouth respectfully shut, while ol' Biff has reported that Tila got tested at the STD clinic and confirmed it was for her porn/sex tape, that they fucked on the 8th floor of his office complex, and that he's 'smashed' her on more than one occasion. If Garry and Tila really did have a relationship, and Garry was respectful and considerate enough to keep his mouth shut, it kinda makes me believe he's the nuttiest of the bunch!

I wish I knew either way, but I thought I’d post this in case any of y’all can make a determination. Just as I’m on the fence about Garry, I suppose you can say I’m on the fence about believing Tila and Garry had a relationship.

In closing, regarding the Biff stuff. I’ve been researching the heck out of that, and it appears to be a 50/50 split that the guy is a crazy stalker dood, and that he’s ‘Sky’. I wasn’t in on the Sky drama, so I can’t comment on that. I would suggest, that perhaps Biff is a male who was playing being a female (Sky), thinking it would get him closer to other females, because he wouldn’t be as threatening.  Or, there really is a Biff and there really is a Sky, and they are really dating (or were dating) and they share the same brand of crazy, and the same obsession with Tila.

Who woulda thunk that there are actually folks out there crazier than Tila?