The Tila fans, Army or Tila herself, can only come up with these superficial attributes that one can possibly be jealous of. No one ever says 'you're jelis of Tila because she's an honorable woman who gives of herself to benefit her community'. No, they say we're jelis because Tila could afford a botched surgery and end up with Picasso tits with nipples pointing in all directions like a compass all out of wack.

So, I decided that I would list all these attributes we could be jelis of and test y'all to see if you're really just jelis of Tila, and have no lives.

These are true or false questions. Sharpen up your number 2's, and no fair peeking:

1. I am jelis because Tila drives a nice expensive car

2. I am jelis because Tila is married to a wonderful man who showers her with love and respect.

3. I am jelis because Tila has raised up her children to be happy and productive members of society.

4. I am jelis because Tila has a gorgeous house and to-die-for furnishings

5. I am jelis because Tila hangs out with all the top A-list celebs and is considered a friend and confidante to many

6. I am jelis because Tila flies first class all over the world

7. I am jelis because Tila has a top notch blog that is read and respected by the upper echelon in media journalism

8. I am jelis because Tila owns a world renown record label showcasing the talents of some of our top musical prodigies

9. I'm jelis because Tila sits at the helm of one of the world's top fashion design firms.

10. I am jelis because Tila has a successful reality show on tv that follows her and her wacky antics

11. I am jelis because Tila's charity, Jayden's Angels has made significant contributions to deprived children

12. I am jelis because I can't wear a couple of belts strapped across my surgically enhanced wonky nipples in public

13. I am jelis because Tila is a leader of the brain trust known as Tila's Army, who reach out to others in a loving, positive supportive environment which teaches acceptance and giving back 

14. I am jelis because Tila needs me more than I need her. Without fans and critics, she's just like me. I can live with being me, she can not.

15. I am jelis because Tila can afford all the illegal street drugs that I can not.

16. I am jelis because Tila is always interviewing interesting celebs and has fun contests on her blog, including flying winners out to LA for shopping sprees and being treated like a celeb for the day.

Okay, kiddies, pencils down. How'd you do? Please tell me at least some of you answered TRUE to all those questions, cause I'd hate to make a liar out of the BrainTrust.