Random Tila sigh-ting:
September 4th, Tila will be hosting the grand opening of Larry Flynt's Hustler Club in Las Vegas.  At least, this is what I'm finding online.  I thought there already was a Hustler Club in Vegas? 

In any case, make sure you watch for all sorts of flying objects!  Better yet, go see Ton Loc and Young MC, who are also performing in Vegas that night.

So she wants to be known as "Miss Tila" because it's classier...but, I mean, who EXACTLY in the strip club circuit is she trying to impress?  Does she think this will up sales of her porno?  And isn't this sort of like shooting fish in a barrel?  She's going to brag about all of the people who showed up for her, but let me tell you something.  Dear old Uncle Eddie here LOVES strippers.  Loves them.  And I especially love going to see them in Vegas.  Those Spearmint Rhino & Glitter Gulch girls have a special place in my heart.  And in Vegas you get a lot of patrons, ESPECIALLY when one is opening. 

Those girls better bleach the hell out of anything she slides her snail trail along, or they'll all end up looking like a blue waffle sooner or later.

If you don't know what a blue waffle is, don't google it.  If you do google it, don't blame me.

Yes, Tila wants you to believe that she lives the life of a mogul. I don't know which mogul exactly, because she does shit like this:



 And of course

Ugh, sick. I don't know about you guys, but that fucking hotdog picture is now my favorite picture of Tila EVER, even though it makes Uncle Eddie's gigantic phallus shrivel up and die. Hey, if The Gnome can have a giant cock, so can I!

Anyway, since her "Party with my Syphilis" tour is now over, we see what the daily life of a mogul...no, fuck that, HOGUL...is really like.

Spiked Tequila gave us a great write-up of Tila trying to get attention from Perez Hilton today, during his twitter feud with Mr. Flesh Colored Beard himself, Spencer Pratt. You can read it here. In short, Tila can't stand that Perez won't give her the time of day, even though she tries so hard to get his attention. Personally I love it. She tries so hard, look:


LOL. I hate to break it to you sweets, but he's not going to respond. He couldn't give less of a fuck about you because you are nothing. You are shit to him. He's not afraid of you, HE JUST DOESN'T GIVE A FUX. LOL see what I did there? Also, the media outlets are saying that about your blog dethroning his because THEY'RE QUOTING YOUR FUCKING DUMB ASS IN THE INTERVIEW YOU GAVE. Jesus fucking Christ Tila, you can't possibly be this stupid, can you?

And just for kicks, let's look at a recent picture of Perez.


Why the fuck does she still call him Piggy Perez? He's obviously lost a lot of weight and looks fucking awesome. Look at him, Tila, you gonna say he's copying your "trademark" blowing a kiss pose? Ooh and he's with Lindsay Lohan - she went to his birthday party! Did she ever go to yours? No? But you tweet her so often! Just because she NEVER EVER responds...I mean...I thought you guys were friends! (LOL no I didn't. You're fucking pathetic, Tila.)

So anyway, a little later Tila can't get off this Perez kick she's on. She tells her Tila Army to vote in this poll:


And you can see her Army runs to it in DROVES. FUCKING DROVES I TELL YOU.

Wanna see how it turned out?


Note: you can STILL go vote on this poll. But oh, poor Tila. Even your army couldn't help you win this one.

And then, my personal favorite, she starts telling us all about Alexa searches.


I did one of my own - I compared Tila's new yet-to-be-launched gossip blog to Perezhilton.com. Here's what I got:


LOL you can hardly even see Tila's gossip blog WAY down there at the bottom! The stats on the right, like where it says "up 70%" are the stats for Tila's gossip blog. Yes, in the past month, when you've been out spouting your meth-crazy word vomit all over the place, the hits for your blog have gone up 70%. Too bad they're going and seeing that it's not launched yet. But you still see how the numbers are REALLY REALLY LOW? Does that show you how successful your PR pantyshot tour was?

And you better believe if the gossip blog actually ever launches we'll be keeping an eye on it, just to see if you ever really do beat Perez. (Hint: DOUBTFUL)

And thus, kiddies, is the real life day of a hogul. Everybody golf clap for Tila!

... thanks for not being a pussy and allowing me to put your identity up.  I'm so glad someone else has some fuckin' balls.  Man, I'm so sick of all of the pansies floating around on twitter with all of the "top secret" bullshit.  So kudos to you my friend, I think you're quite swell.

TRS, what in the hell are you talkin' about?  Ladies and gents, do you remember Tila's classy live performance in NYC last weekend?  If not, here's a little replay!

So it seems that the pathological liar "Miss Tila" decided to torture the masses with her cockeyed nipples at some classy joint called The Crazy Horse.


Because we here at the Rotspot are always doing our best to bring you the most accurate and current of Tila's shenanigans, we did a little bit of research...and it seems that The Crazy Horse is also an escort club...but of COURSE it is...why ELSE would she be there?


Is this really surprising to anyone? I mean for fucks sake she wore a lavender doily as a dress to the Howard Stern interview. She also admitted to Howard that she had previously been a hooker stripper. This is what Tila knows...it's also the only thing she's "good" at. Flaunting mangled tits, granny ass, and being a whore. In Tila's world, it seems that mogul, entrepreneur, and business woman all revolve around the fact that she sells her tainted snatch for dolla dolla bills yall...I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that the only thing Tila was trying to promote at this club, were her "special 1 time deals". You say mogul, I say prostitute. Po-tay-to, Po-tah-to.

All suited up in her trashy Batman Costume classy lingerie while slobbin' on some sausage, Stuporgirl lubes up her brain and takes a stroll through memory lane giving advice to 12 year old wanna be strippers.  Ah, the sweet life of lube, sausage links, underage children, anal sex, and being used as a whore for a few days.  Really Stuporgirl, how did you get SO lucky?  I just want to know ... what's it like taking it ass to mouth?

So in the wee hours of the morning Tila chose to strip (it's the only thing she knows HOW to do) for her "devoted" Ustream fans. You can see her pushing her stomach out, trying to look a bit pregnant like other celebs she's mentioned then revoked from her blog. She never ceases to amaze me at the lengths she'll go to just to continue to lie. Click here for the link ...

• She claims she has a "mommy glow". It's bronzer. You can tell by the shine on her cheeks and forehead and can see the caked on makeup.
• Her weave is ratted up, time for a new one.
• She constantly talks about her tits being huge. What's new?
• She's fuckin' geeked out on something which is why she claims she hasn't slept in days. Cocaine? Meth? Crack? Take your pick!
• She talks about her vagina being tight ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I can't EVEN STOP laughing long enough to write anything witty.
• She's talking shit/making a song about "the Game". I don't think she realizes he REALLY is involved with a gang and she actually might be playing with fire this time. How do YOU want to hear she went out? In a dumpster? I mean, we have to take out the garbage sometime, right?