Yeah yeah yeah, I've missed roll call the last few days, but I keep up with the shenanigans when I can. When Uncle Eddie waxes nostalgic over boobies of days gone by, well, it just pulls me out of the woodwork and I have to dig around in the muck for a story of my own. Granted, I can't keep up with the glory that is boobies, but with nothing much to do, and still being in pain from my back (xrays this week, YAY!) I thought I'd tool around in the dumpster and see what I could find:

Way back in June, June 5, to be exact, we awoke to the alleged carnage of the alleged Jane and the alleged arm meet torn to shreds:

The last part is what I want to discuss. You see, back on August 4, almost 2 months to the day following ArmMeet-Gate, Tila posted up this 'Exclusive' attempting to rein in rumors of a sex tape/porn, that she obviously thought Garry leaked/lied about.

In the last couple of hours Tila posted an article on the Flog, describing how Juggalos were now at war with each other. It's a whole lot of Tila crap, and not worth the read, but as usual, the comments bring on the lolz!

This was posted around 10:00 pm tonight:

Within 5 hours of the incident, the cuts were already clotted and on their way to healing, as evidenced by the photos she submitted to TMZ, exaggerated blood presence, notwithstanding. Secondly, with Tila's "big name" and "high profile" as a model/actress/singer/mogul (I know, I know, I'm trying hard not to laugh too!) if she needed any stitches on her face, a licensed reconstructive surgeon would come in. 

You see, stitches leave scars that are often worse than what you started out with. I know, I've had a bunch of stitches in my life, and you get a bunch of little holes on either side of the original wound, and oftentimes if the skin stretches, you'll get a much wider scar. The very most a doctor would do to those wounds is glue it shut, so as not to add to the skin trauma. But those cuts were so small, a simple butterfly band-aid would suffice. I got my chin split open and that's all I got for it, though the scar is about 3/4 long.

Tila did not have stitches. Tila did not have the "wounds" glued shut. A PA cleaned the broken skin. A doctor came in, looked at the areas and instructed the PA to apply those teensy tiny circle bandaids. The bitch didn't even need the bandaids, the doctor had them put on, because if you've ever been around a 2-year old who bumps their knee, though no skin is broken, a little bandaid and a kiss on the owie is enough to satisfy their desire for attention.

Any doctor who gave her a script for pain meds for an injury that required nothing more than a light cleaning, should have their license revoked. The most I can see them prescribing is Tylenol for the pain of any bruises. There is no fucking way the bitch walked out of the hospital with a prescription-strength pain reliever. No fucking way. There's no fucking way the doctor ordered bed rest. As a matter of fact, doctors ordering 'bedrest' for patients went out with the horse and buggy. My mom had surgery on her foot last Wednesday. They set a small broken bone and stapled her fucking foot together. Four days later, she's walking with assistance, and off all meds. The woman has 9 fucking staples and the doctor says to take it easy, and stay off it as much as possible, but no one ordered bed rest, for 9 fucking staples! She had some opiates the first few days, but she no longer needs anything stronger than prescription-strength Tylenol. Yeah, she still has some pain, but it's managed pretty well.

So, Tila is on what she'd like you to believe are opiate pain killers and complete bedrest working into the 5th day after she got a little boo-boo on her face, yet she claims a devastating accident that not only "dented" her head, gave her a concussion, AND caused the infamous mischairage, warranted nothing more than changing into a white pair of pants and flying halfway around the world to perform at dive bars. No opiates. No bed rest. No staying out of the sun for a year.

You also know what she wants you to believe? She wants you to believe that she's in control of the Juggalo Gathering from here on out. She's vowed to stop the Gathering. Countdown to her saying in the coming days/weeks that she decided to let the Juggalos have their Gathering place after all, and they have her to thank for not taking it away. She will spin it that she felt bad for the good Juggalos and didn't want to punish all the Juggalos for the bad behavior of a few. 

Why would she do that? Oh dear rotspot reader, don't offend me with your ignorance. Tila has no lawsuit, and if on the offchance she did, she'll either lose outright, or win a nominal sum which will be a private, of course,  settlement. Tila will spin it that she decided that the Juggalos needed a venue after all, and they better behave from here on out. But, the event will never have been in danger in the first place. The Juggalos would be there next year with or without Tila, they have no fear that she'll totally shut them down. She just wants them to believe she holds the cards, so they'll be grateful for how "cool" she is when she gives them back their event.

Let's look a little deeper into this contract thing. She claims that even though she knew of the potential for violence, because it's very obviously all over the internet that the culture of the Juggalos involves throwing water, Faygo, beer, and plastic bottles at the performers, that she knew of their penchant for violence, that she went because she doesn't judge people. 

Knowing all that, she still signed a contract and then said because of that contract, she had to perform or get sued. No Tila you don't have to perform if the venue is dangerous in a life-or-limb  way. Any judge in the land would listen to your side of the story about how you signed the contract, and then afterwards you receive threats and warnings that your life was in danger. They would totally take that into account. As a matter of fact, after the first stone rock hit you in the face, before you took the stage, you'd have a cause of action to pull out of the contract. And the ICP guys claim they paid you upfront and assured you that if it got too wild for you, you could pull out with no further obligations or litigation. And they were right, you could because at that point, it would be a breach of contract on their part.

Ugh this skank bitch is just flying high with this story. Keep track of the day she says she'll "allow" the Juggalos to have their event, because she's a good person and she's a forgiving person. It's coming.

Tila's gone on a rampage over at her piece of shit blog!!! It starts off with her posting a half naked pic, and using the fact her computer is broken as an excuse for not having more current sexy pix (there are none, hahahahaha), and then devolves into her flipping out over a couple of haters and having her PI gather IPs from Google over the last couple of days.

Oh, and let me touch on this 'jealousy', or as your Army of Morons and Halfwits tend to spell it 'jelisy', I have a beautiful family, including my own smart, witty, compassionate, gorgeous children. We live in a small house (larger than your apartmansion as it turns out, and more expensive!) and enjoy the love and respect and support of family, friends and our community. We are far from financially rich, but we get by. Now let's compare that to your life. You are estranged from most of your family. You are alone and desperate in a town that values surface beauty and no talent. You are aging quickly, and are no longer the cute darling of the reality show world. You are unable to keep a meaningful relationship, and within the last year, you have lost one 'wifey' and at least three fetuses (imaginary or otherwise). You have engaged in heated fights with lovers and haters. You are the laughingstock of Hollywood (just use your friend Mr. Google to try to find a positive review of anything you've been involved in in the last several years). You have no talent. You used to be a pretty girl, but your own self-hatred sullied what looks you had. The only attention you are able to get, is through taking off your clothes. People with talent NEVER have to take off their clothes to get recognized. Ever. So Tila, please tell me what part of your life I am jealous of? Am I jealous that my parents stand by me and trust me and are proud of me? Am I jealous that even though you may be prettier, that you have no one in your life who can stand being with you for more than 4 days in an intimate relationship? Am I jealous that despite my own two miscarriages (the second was last month, I didn't feel the need to tweet about it, or travel halfway across the globe, sorry), I have two wonderful kids who have made me proud in more ways than I can count? Am I jealous that you have no credibility and no one in any media believes you? Am I jealous that I can hang up my "Fatty" nic and take just about any opportunity that comes my way and not only be supported, but be successful? Can you do that Tila? Can you hang up your Tila Tequila or Miss Tequila or whatever you call yourself, and walk out in public and say the same? I'll let you draw your own conclusions about whether I'm jealous or not (because your brain matter is lighter than air, it tends to collect in the conical portion of your head, so I'll answer this for you: I'm not jealous).

You know what I am Tila? I'm disgusted by a 28-year old woman who attempts to seduce and sexualize young kids. I'm disgusted by a grown woman who lies to these kids and parades her most flamboyant and disastrous mistakes as if they were normal. I'm disgusted by a grown woman who is so consumed with jealousy for real celebrities that she creates a blog to air that hate, for no other reason than to hate. And mostly, Tila, I am sad for you. You think the pretty face and big knockers are your ticket to happiness. They're not, and as many who have walked those Hollywood streets can tell you, they never were.

PS: Your blog will probably fail within months if you continue as you're doing. There is no sustainability in hate and thievery. You'll tuck the site away, like it never happened, and then claim the haters caused so many problems they broke it. You'll likely find yourself in that same court you believe you'll see me. Whatever the excuse, I imagine we won't see you past this summer. Your secret to success, as posted on your blog to Amber Rose, about staying relevant, by kissing girls, creating drama, etc, is no way to live your life. If you have no talent, then all the tricks and gimmicks you create will do nothing but extend your miserable 15 minutes. Go for it gutterslut. Just know I'll be here watching and waiting.