Wednesday, July 21

postheadericon Lies, lies, LIES!


Tila is stupid. She's several-extra-chromosomes stupid. How do I know? If I knew there were several web sites devoted, I mean, DEVOTED to dissecting my blogs, tweets, Facebook posts, interviews, and appearances, and then making a fool out of me (and a liar, to boot), I'd be very careful about providing them with more ammo. It doesn't matter how many guns your enemies are toting, they're completely useless without the ammo. If you supply the ammo, you're the fool.

Then a kind commenter here at the Rotspot (thanks Boots!) posted a url for this interesting interview Tila had with Digital Spy this week.

Let's break this bad boy down, shall we?




she doesn't do things in half measures! With new single 'I Love My DJ', new EP Welcome To The Dark Side and her very own record label to run - not to mention a management firm and her own gossip blog - we somehow managed to grab a few minutes in her hectic schedule for a chat.
Her very own record label to run? Well this label has been around since January, how many people has she signed in the last 8 months? Let me give you a sec to count to ZERO! RazB? Nope. TexazTwinz? Nope. Rob Johnson? Nope. As a matter of fact Tila changed the name and created a symbol she promised to reveal to the world months ago. We still haven't seen or heard anything since.

Management firm? Would that be LittleMissTrendSetter? Oh goody, please tell me who she's managing? Ford model? Nope. Shawn Merriman? Nope. He sued her ass for copyright infringement back in December 2009, and won a reported $2 million default judgement. The only 'client' she has, is herself.

Gossip blog? I didn't realize she had a gossip blog. Ohhhhhh. The Flog!! My mistake. I thought that was a self-grandizing, marketing ploy that ripped off stories and pictures from legitimate sources and passed them off as her own.

Tila Tequila is so long ago - it was a screen name, it was on MySpace, it was from Shot At Love.
Is this a multiple choice question? Let me fill in the rest of the choices:

A. it was a screen name
B. it was on MySpace
C. it was from Shot At Love
D. it was given to me at age 13 after I got sick after drinking tequila
E. it was an ironic nickname because I can not, and do not drink alcohol

I'm aspiring to be a mogul.
BWAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh, wait, I mean, oh Tila dear, you want to be a mogul? Well honey you're talented enough and you're smart enough to be the biggest mogul the world has every known. You go get them girl!! BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. Sorry folks, that just made me all 5 ways silly. A mogul isn't something you aspire to, like being a washed up, std-riddled lying skank. No. A mogul is accomplished after many years of hard work, contemplative business decisions and a keen sense of business and finance. A mogul is never a self-titled position, its a status other see you as. Mogul. Heh. Sorry.

I don't like to copy trends and what's hot right now
Well you slipped in a true statement there Tila. You damn well do not copy trends or copy what's hot right now! Why should you follow trends about decorum and self-worth, when you can be a trendsetter, instead of a trend follower? What A-list (or Z-list) celeb does that whole rolling-on-the-ground-like-an-convulsing gutterslut pose? No one! What A-Z List celeb stuffs their wonky nips into an ingenius top made of belts? No one! What A-Z List celeb knowingly walks out of their hotel room without their panties and then proceeds to flash her rancid vag lips to the audience? No one! You started these trends Tila. Never let anyone take that away from you!

Blue Dress' and it means a lot to me. I sing it with so much passion because somebody really inspired me to just get out there and do it, and every time I sing it I remember that person and I don't see anybody else.

Casey cries in Heaven every time she hears you caterwauling this song you dedicated to her. Jesus is right beside her, crying the same big ass tears and shaking his fist at that heroic Viet Cong who allowed your family to live to see your birth 6 years later.

I'm in negotiations to sign an artist from New Zealand at the moment. I was supposed to fly him out here to be with me but there's so much stuff going on I thought I should deal with it when I'm back home. We've been working with him for the past few months

Was this interview done back in April, before April 23 when she posted up this blog that confirms Rob is signed (after only a couple of hours of negotiations it seems...sigh things were so much easier back in the olden days!)

Oh, I get it. He was signed, but then they went back to the negotiations, and now he'll be signed again. I hope he has time to get that summer album launched, cause my calender says July 21...and that's one month in to the three months summer. Silly me.  I bet she meant New Zealands summer, which is December to February. 

I don't want to be one of those people who tries to do this and that and is then a mess, so I told them to let me take care of this first, take care of him and I'll do it one at a time. It's a small business building up. Once it gets bigger I can bring more people on. I want to do it the point where it's realistic what I can handle.
Confucius says: If a record label isn't prepared to sign their first contract, and they don't have the time to drop an album and launch a tour...well can they be said to be prepared to be a record label? 

Once it gets bigger I can bring more people on.
How many more people do you need beyond the 20-30 you claim currently work for you? Maybe you can pull Bradshaw off fashion and have him do something worthwhile for a change. Aww don't get sand all up in your vagina, 9Head. You know I love any gay man with a plato-esque forehead and paint rollered on eye brows who can bedazzle the hell out of hooker!

I think it's great because it makes their dreams come true but the only con is that it happens overnight and the contracts aren't great
But, but.... I thought that's what your record label was all about...making people overnight stars and promising all their dreams will come true! It's all right there in that Rob Johnson blog above...

And no Tila. The "only con" is you.

I may be reading too much into all this. Tila, no offense, but I think you kinda told the smallest smidgen of a lie in that interview.

36 comments:

Isis said...

Of course it's the fact that the contracts suck, nothing to do with the fact that her singing voice sounds like the cats she has to flay in order to make her thit kho.

deluwiel said...

ooh! ooh! *waves hand frantically in the air* My favorite part is where she's saying how she was working with the X Factor girls (?), then she found Rob, so she ditched the X Factor girls 'cause she can't deal with more than one thing at a time and she was going to fly Rob to London to be with her but because she's sooooo busy and has so much else to do and and so much stuff going on she's gonna leave poor Rob twisting in the wind waiting for her to get her shit together so she can actually devote some time to managing him which is what a management company does but she's too frikkin busy to do it...

My second favorite part is her talking about her epic 3-song EP and it's "classic timeless music like Marilyn Monroe and the 50s kind of style." Ummm how the hell does ANY of those three songs qualify as 50s style or conjure up images of Marilyn Monroe? "Get Me Off"? Country song with dirty lyrics? I don't get it. I just don't get it.

imoutofit said...

Boo hiss at Tila's cover of Blue Dress. Shame on you for defiling such an awesome song by Depeche Mode.

Her singing belongs in one of those smokey and seedy looking karaoke bars. If you go to her YouTube page, you'll see a video of her "singing" Bizarre Love Triangle. Way to ruin a great 80s song, Tila.

Emily said...

Brilliant post, Fatty! What a fucking idiot she is! Why would any media outlet worth a shit want to interview her? She really can't keep from lying...it's totally pathological. With Thien Thanh, there are two options: she says nothing at all....or she lies.

Michelle said...

I love this blog and I appreciate all the hard work you all put into reading Tila's mess, researching her past lies, etc. Not only do you give us the important information, but you make us laugh while doing so. Thanks!

That being said, would you mind not referring to Tila's rolling around on the carpet while being photographed as "rolling-on-the-ground-like-an-epileptic gutterslut pose"? I'm epileptic and it's already embarrassing enough to have a seizure without having Tila's antics be described as such and, thus, loosely, be compared to her craziness.

Thanks. Keep up the awesome work.

Vintage Pink said...

Oh, the WINNER from NZ idol.
I had totally forgotten about him.
You know, #7 runner up NZ idol??
Isnt that the one : )

Anna said...

Someone should email a link to this post to them so they can see what's up. What do you suppose would happen if they read this?

Just One of Many said...

Hey--when one country hates you and wishes for your death, take the Tila Tequila road--infest another continent.

I am absolutely in LOVE with that picture of the hogul used for this article. I especially love how it looks like it should be used in a douche or pantyliner ad in YM magazine, circa 1994.

Joann said...

Every interview Tila goes on she lies. She has to cause there's nothing going on her life that's noteworthy.

Her only option is to make herself APPEAR like she's doing so much and got so much going on in her life when in reality she don't and they know it too.

Those people aren't dumb. All they do is stroke her ego to honor their commitment to interview her or for some they might get a free "f" out of it.

She has no record label, no management company, no nothing. The only thing Tila does is stay on twitter and her joke of a blog 24/7.

One of the girls in her idiotic army kept tweeting Tila over and over and over saying she would be coming to London and would Tila tweet her back and tell where they could meet. Of course Tila never answered.

I'm pretty sure Rob will never be heard of again just like the Texaz Twinz, the musician, the actor, the Ford Supermodel & the Pro Football Star.

Fatty McFatterson said...

Michelle, my apologies. There's always a balancing act when it comes to describing Tila's antics. If I'm not offending the guttersluts, I'm offending the twatwaffles and bitchpickles.

But real talk, I appreciate your post and will not make a reference like that again.

Michelle said...

Thanks, Fatty.

I feel like the guttersluts, twatwaffles, bitchpickles make the choice to constantly be in embarrassing situations, therefore they're open for comparison. I appreciate the consideration.

Monique said...

My 2 favorite parts of the interview.

"I want to be a mogul like Jay-Z or Diddy or Donald Trump, but instead a female mogul."

Female mogul? As opposed to what? A midget mogul?

"because when that comes out there will be a lot of work because there is the tour and the press. I'm doing press for the single alone now and then it's summer so I need a vacation first of all! And then Christmas is coming up... maybe sometime next year."

Christmas? Really?

Kelly said...

I'd just like to note that this so called amazing guy from New Zealand is a NOBODY. I am from NZ and the losers that go on NZ Idol don't make it, even the "winners" so trust me, if this guy was signed to (or in discussions with the US to be signed) Tila's Label it would be BIG news in NZ, and there has been nothing about it. Plus, yeah, he made it to the Top 10, years ago, but a lot of them are talentless fools, so I wouldn't be spreading around making the Top 10 if it was me! So short story, signing this loser? YEAH RIGHT.

Seagal said...

Whatever happened to reporters/journalists/interviewers who did background work on the people they interview like the writers here at our own RotSpot?

It would be so so sweet for one of these people to call her out on her lies and all the assinine famewhore stunts she pulls in public, like you all do.

Guess I'll just keep waiting for a journalist with guts to do that.

John said...

Rotspot is always one step ahead of me, so it is probably useless of me to suggest these links to them/you but here I go anyway. These are vids from Tila's UK tour;

Tila performing demurely because she is pantyless at Valbonne:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOhItQPM5FI

Interview with 'social writers' (who?); http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bq0vyGWsnQo
part 2:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kyf6MHFBIK4

Some photoshoot- fhm online possibly
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xVH5A4yYEk

Forgive me for not watching them through. I searched for the Valbonne one, found these too and I really can't bring myself to sit all the way through them. Rotspot- If you could watch them for me I promise to donate generously towards your eventual mental rehabilitation and STD clinic costs. Deal?

rob said...

Another lie for you! Tila said (from intense debate profile, comments on this post were oh-so-conveniently baleeted):

3 weeks ago @ MissTilaOMG! - IS DRAKE "SWAGGA JACKI... · 20 replies · -43 points

"Oh you mean at the MAXIM 100 PARTY THAT I WAS INVITED TO? AND WAS IN THE MAXIM 100 LIST FOR 2 YEARS IN A ROW? PLUS VH1 DOING A TV SPECIAL ABOUT IT AND INTERVIEWED ME FOR Vh1?? Where were you that night? Oh right. Sitting at home and hating on me. Plus I know all the photographers by now dumbass. They're like my buddies. I like to joke around with them. Ur not there, nor will you EVER be so of course you wouldn't know what really happened and the story behind those pictures. How sad you are."


So then whoretits, you must be bestest mates with all of the London paps, right? How else would you possibly explain these photos?
http://heymanhustle.craveonline.com/articles/news/104497

Ima said...

What you said "If I knew there were several web sites devoted, I mean, DEVOTED to dissecting my blogs, tweets, Facebook posts, interviews, and appearances, and then making a fool out of me (and a liar, to boot), I'd be very careful about providing them with more ammo. It doesn't matter how many guns your enemies are toting, they're completely useless without the ammo. If you supply the ammo, you're the fool."

Is so entirely 100% true. Tila (Hi Tila!!) just makes it so easy that it's become my favourite pasttime - but in all seriousness, I've never ceased to be amazed at other people's stupidity as well.

"If you supply the ammo, you're the fool." is my quote for the day :)

Sheriff Gauncent said...

Not only Rob's summer album, shouldn't the comic book be coming out soon?

Ben said...

Well she'll have plenty of time to work on everything because (as everyone expected)

"nyway, I’m about to head back to the states right now… L.A. Wesssssssssside home sweet home!"

Cue is the "I came home instead of going on vacation...

A) because I missed my army
B) because I have a huge surprise project I'll never reveal
C) I'm broke
D) I need to have this rash checked out.

You'd think as crazy as she is she wouldn't be so predictable.

Kitschy Kitten said...

BAHA she finally blocked me from her flog. Which is fine, it really is the most boring shit to look at anyway. It was fun to see her squirm at the comments while it lasted, but the whole website's going down soon anyway :)

Gotta love how she didn't say she wanted to be a mogul like Kimora Lee Simmons because she would've gotten her ass kicked for just mentioning the actual female mogul's name. Other favorite part was her plans for her full album "Welcome to the Darkside" and "Welcome to the Party." OMGZ you guys she's lyke SOOOO DEEP AND CLEVERZ! *barf*

LOL her latest blog is her bragging about hanging out with Amy Winehouse. Who might be an even bigger joke than Tila herself. They can die happy drug addicts together, wouldn't it be sweet?

i_am_that_girl said...

I was on Twitter this morning and I saw this beautiful gem:
TheLoveStories When you lie, you have to cover that lie with another lie which means you will always lie until you tell the truth. -@bra_yeun #TLS

deluwiel said...

Jeebus. Looks like she missed her flight AGAIN. She's saying she has to stay in London until Monday because there aren't any flights out until then. Really? Nobody is flying out of London for 4 days? Moron.

livvey said...

That first video that John put up shows exactly why Tila is not a celebrity.

She has no "it" factor. You put someone like Gwen Stefani on a stage and people are drawn to her. She has just that something special that makes people want to see what she's going to do. The only reason people watch Tila is not to see what she's going to do in a good way, but in a trainwreck way. It reminds me of Dancing with the Stars how reality show people tend not to do that well. If you are famous for being famous with no discernible talent it shows and there is nowhere to hide. Tila just doesn't have "it". You'd think after so many years of trying to make it big and never achieving success that she'd try another line of work.

The people behind her looked so bored.

Isis said...

Well if the ammo you provide turn out to be nothing more than blanks if you have no self-esteem to begin with, you're going to be embarrassed.

Joann said...

@Rob...thanks for the link to the article and pictures.

Tila has a bunch of teenage followers and look how she's posing. She knows they will see these pictures but she don't care..acting like a skank as usual.

Notice how the article starts out:
"Twisted bisexual reality show popwreck turned twisted bisexual blogging popwreck Tila Tequila"

They take pictures of her, probably tell her she looks beautiful, which the paparazzi say to all the females they're shooting, and she thinks she is hot.

Then they laugh at her behind her back and write up some horrible reviews on her looks, singing and everything else.

Everybody knows Tila's time was over after her TV show. She is done, done, done yet still trying to hang in there with this BS she calls entertainment.

No one wants Tila but a bunch of horny young and old men and her idiotic army.

starfish said...

Lots of people trying to make it in the industry lie and embellish their stories, they hype themselves up, and most people simply take their word because they do have some sort of show to back it up, and yes tila has been around for a while, but thanks to rotspot, it clearly exposes all of her inconsistencies, lies, and half truths, along with morsels of her 'staged insanity tactics'. usually, magazines, reporters etc, will not really do the research and just interview because that is their job (take notes nikki raney). i lived in hollywood and people just hype themselves up all the time. believe me, i worked for jailed rapist fashion designer anand jon and he was the BIGGEST SOCIOPATHIC, EGOTISTICAL, PREDATOR, CON ARTIST YOU WILL EVER MEET. he was worse than tila. google his name. he had the cheesiest website and he had pictures of him with all sorts of celebrities, he was not lying tho, he managed to get into fashion week, do runway shows, get on americas next top model, (his press book is full of clippings, interviews, pictures, fashion shows, tv shows he was on, celebrities he styled)...but he was a con artist and rapist. i hate him! he was able to find people to manipulate etc...he managed to be named 'one to look for in 2007,' by newsweek magazine! little did he know, he was arrested in 2007, thanks to me and some other girls working for him...

anyways, sorry about talking about him, but google this predator. he is now sitting in jail thank god!

anyways, its what the industry does, to hype them up. they believe they are the best and therefore that is how they get by. we all know tila's heyday has come and gone, and now she is doing these little 'mini-tours' or whatever the heck it is she is doing. she can call herself a mogul all she wants, but i doubt she will get to the same level as diddy and jay-z are at, like she says she wants to be. oh she also says jay-z is part of the illuminati, so she is also sounding like some sort of hypocrite. thanks guys

starfish said...

john

i checked those links, she plays piano pretty good. that social writers interview was not good because they didnt even mic her, so i didnt listen to the whole thing...

Boots said...

Ha!

Awesome disection of my link :) If I find any more beauties I'll swing them your way!

Boots said...

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/showbiz/news/a248467/miss-tila-wants-to-befriend-winehouse.html

Looks like Digital Spy are licking her ass lately.

Just One of Many said...

So...basically, everything out of her mouth is a lie. I mean, have you guys even confirmed otherwise?

So there's some crazy shit going on today in "The Days of Tila's Personality's Lives". She, being the alarm clock-less, "can't use the phone to get a wakeup call" mogul missed her flight out of Heathrow. And of course, it's Heathrow's fault, because they were supposed to let her on the plane even though she showed up late. I dunno...anytime I've ever seen a celebrity at the airport, they are always assisted by someone at that airport to get through lines so that no one bothers them. I guess Heathrow has irrational, "stupid airport rules" and they love being the "cock blocker" of moguls.

But, like any thriving mogul, Tila can't get home to LA because there are absolutely NO flights going out of Heathrow until MONDAY. MONDAY. One of the busiest airports in the world. MONDAY. But wait....wasn't she going on a lavish European vacay, going to Italy and other great mogul destinations? Well, I guess she got notice to vacate, because she's coming back to terrorize our lives in the states with her herpes lesions.

Okay, now on to more important and interesting people. This was posted on the mogul's website under comments for her latest audio posts (ugh, I fucking hate those posts...they remind me of my ex best friend who would accidentally drunk dial my cell phone and I've have a five minute pocket dial drunk message on my phone every Saturday night). A self-professed fan (by "fan", I mean he/she actually admits that he'd "hit it", and yeah, that shows some level of dedication and willingness to put one's life in danger) named Dayna posted this:

"Yo someone needs to tell this bitch she is gonna get tons of bottles of piss thrown at her at the gathering of the juggalos .....and NO i aint gonna be the one to do it...i just see people talking....she gonna get it bad if she goes...id hit it tho"

This made me laugh and laugh and laugh. This juggalo mess gives me hope in the world.

Joann said...

The skank missed her flight back to LA, even though she said she was going to Italy after her bar hopping tour..but that another story...anyway, she now wants her idiotic army to think that positive energy crap she's been spewing about before she left is really paying off for her. Even though she missed her plane, karma blessed her in another way.

Since Tila had to wait a long time for another plane out she bought some lottery tickets and GUESS WHAT:

"OmG!! After a long horrible day missing all flights, I bought lottery tickets and won 40 bucks and another: 5 star trip to Turkey for 2! OMG 35 minutes ago via UberTwitter"

I buy lottery tickets ALL THE TIME and she might have won $40 bucks, which I have done before, but no lottery tickets from any country pays off in trips...only money.

Now this time she bought a magazine and more lottery tickets and went back to her hotel and GUESS WHAT..READ TWEETS FROM BOTTOM UP.

"All I know is this is my karma! I work so hard, care about people so much, and always keep my head up! Now I hit it big w 3 lottery tickets! 2 minutes ago via UberTwitter"

"Dude... I also won a large amount of money... But I don't wanna say how much on here! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! Holy shit! I'm gonna buy a jet! 4 minutes ago via UberTwitter"

"I can't believe it still! Worst day at airport. Bought some mags and lottery tickets. Waiting at my hotel. Now I won the lottery!! Wtf! Whoa 5 minutes ago via UberTwitter"



So she won $40 bucks, a trip to Turkey and hit the jackpot and won enough money to buy a jet.

Since she won so big her picture should be plastered all over the London news today...you know with her being such a big star and all. SMH.

John said...

To I_am_that_girl: Good quote! I read this one recently and I think it applies PERFECTLY to Tila:

Samuel Johnson : He that pursues fame with just claims, trusts his happiness to the winds; but he that endeavors after it by false merit, has to fear, not only the violence of the storm, but the leaks of his vessel.

Joann said...

@Just One of Many....that was funny. He's trying to give Tila the heads up then says "id hit it tho".

That's sad when all a mans wants to do to her is screw her, then they're finished with her.

Aviva said...

My thoughts on the failure of life that is Tila Tequila goes to back to this video B. Scott did about her - the title is highly appropriate don't cha think Hoe-Have-A-Seat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pOEicMoJIlo

Isis said...

Europe is on vacation....I still can't get over that....ow...my brain.....

I go wherever I want to for celebrity gossip. Period.

Barbara said...

She's home now (Saturday morning) according to her idiotic Tweeting. Yes, I'm a moron for following her, but it's funny to see her aimless fapping.

She's going on about missing the last fifteen minutes of her in-flight movie, picking Onyx up and how she's going to pamper herself with some me time, since she doesn't get to just take time off (rolling my eyes). She's a deluded idiot, not that that's any news.

Liar, liar, Tila's pants are on fire! I choked at the part about why she wants to be called "Miss Tila" - why that section struck me as the funniest, I don't know, but it did.

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