Tuesday, April 20

postheadericon PR.com - so far up Tila's ass, they found Narnia

God, you guys! You ruined the surprise! We've been working on the PR.com interview since yesterday but NOOOOO you guys had to leave it in the comments and ruin it for everybody! GEEZ!

Just playin' y'all. You know we love you! But you gotta trust us that we're on top of this shit. Who run this motherfucker? That's right, Rotspot. Now sit on Uncle Eddie's lap and listen to a story about a little delusional blond gnome.

A long, long time ago, in a forest far, far away...










I took it upon myself to underline all the parts that made me LOL. But let's discuss it a little bit, shall we?

So the first thing I underlined is that it calls her a Vietnamese immigrant. I'm sorry, but don't you actually have to immigrate from Vietnam to be called a Vietnamese immigrant? Say, like, your parents immigrate from Vietnam before you're born and you're born in Singapore, does that really make you a Vietnamese immigrant? *Credit goes to STFUtilaOMG for pointing this out to me!* Example:


Yes, I know, Wikipedia isn't the most TRUSTED of sources. But go ahead, look for yourself. See if you can find any different information. I couldn't. I did find this though, and it made me lol for hours:


.....Anyway! Let's continue with Tila's PR.com interview.

She talks a lot about her new gossip blog, which begs the question WHAT NEW GOSSIP BLOG? I don't see one, do you? Why is she doing all this press for something she couldn't get released on time and STILL isn't up? Kind of reminds me when she did all that press for being pregnant, and we know where that turned up...

"I'm so smart that I think I'm an alien sometimes."


 LOL just sayin'. Anyway, lots of us think you're an alien sometimes too, Tila,but that doesn't have to do with how smart you are. It has to do with the shape of your head. See?

Okay moving on. Blah blah blah, Ambassador. Ugh, I'm so sick of this one. Seriously Tila, there are so many nude pictures and fucking softcore porn videos of you out there that you will NEVER EVER EVER BECOME AN AMBASSADOR. Go here to see what it takes to become an ambassador.

Also, she's so humble, isn't she? Talking about how her video got deleted off of Facebook because girls are jealous, and how she's so pretty and smart AND INTELLIGENT all at the same time! How exactly is one smart AND intelligent at the same time? Nice.

So then we get to the video of her shoplifting from CVS. I don't know if Allison Kugel is retarded or just playing into Tila's ego, but nobody on earth took that shit seriously. Tila is a horrible actress and should stick to Skinemax if she ever tries acting seriously. (Yes I know she had a 2 minute scene in 'Chuck and Larry' where she plays a fucking Hooters girl, I'm talking SERIOUS acting, and you know it's only a matter of time until she tries that shit again.) Click here if you haven't seen the CVS video and want a good laugh.
I lolled extra hard when she talks about how sweet she is with people, and in relationships. I mean, really Tila? Are you sure about that?


Oh shit, my bad y'all. Tila is sweet as fucking pie. I just forgot.

Okay, you guys see where she says "I know I will dethrone his site in less than a month?" Okay, keep that in mind. Don't think we won't be checking stats.

Oh, here we go. The crotch shots. Really Tila? There's never been a picture like that of you? I want you guys to go to the Hotspot. I know, you shouldn't because she gets paid when you go. But I want you to see how sneaky Tila is. When she gave this interview she (or her people, who knows) deleted the crotch shot pictures from her Paparazzi photo album. I'll make it easy for you. Here's her photo page. Click on Paparazzi. Notice a certain one is missing? Gosh, Tila, you're too smart for us. You really must be 10 steps ahead! Because nobody was quick enough to save those before you deleted them!

Oh shit, wait.


I love how she labels them "crotch shot" just to make it easier for us. Tila, this makes you look bad, as usual, but this makes Allison Kugel look REALLY BAD. LOL. Good. That's what you get for being a hack journalist, Allison.

Moving on, isn't Blue Dress on her new album? Is she saying she wrote that AGAIN? Lord have mercy. I...I can't even be bothered. You all know it's a Depeche Mode song. I can't do it.

LOL she gets to the Tila Tequila name again. This time she gives both lies, that she got it in 8th grade and that it was just a screen name. Ugh, so here, I can't be bothered to out this shit again. Just read what I said the first time.

I can't believe she combined the two. And poor Carlos gets left out in the cold AGAIN.

Oh, and I feel like we need to make this clear. Tila? We are most certainly laughing at you. Don't believe me?

Here: 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU SUCK TILA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 

How was that? Got it now? Okay good, let's move on.

Ugh, really I'm so bored with this slut by now. Aren't you? I mean, it's the same old bullshit over and over and over. "I'm adopting, I was pregnant, I fucked a DJ" OVER AND OVER AND OVER. Goddammit Tila, you're boring me!

Just for funsies, I included Allison's info, in case any of you want to drop her a line and tell her she's a fucking sham. I already did. Hell, link her here. Tell her to stop being a fucking pussy and get the real story. DO SOME FUCKING RESEARCH, ALLISON, AND MAYBE YOU'D RETAIN SOME FUCKING CREDIBILITY. Just sayin'.

Later, asswads, I'm out!

16 comments:

jayden said...

Just so everyone knows ---- pr.com is not a third party editorial/news site. It is a free site for PR hacks to submit their own press releases and puff articles written about their clients. Allison Kugel, the author of this "article," is a writer for hire who specializes in writing such puff pieces for PR firms.

alison m m said...

"puff piece" are words that totally suit the article

jayden said...

There's a certain type of firm in the PR industry that essentially deals in vanity. They are able to get bookings and press, but the media they book are basically useless to the branding and image building goals of the client --- completely untargeted media that doesn't reach the audience the client needs. They depend on clients who are clueless and vain. The client sees all this coverage and it convinces them that the firm is doing an awesome job of promoting them, when in fact they're just taking the client's money and accomplishing nothing productive to build the brand and image. I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

Kris said...

If you look at this site:

http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/?p=35013

She claims no crotch shots and YET there are at least 2 on there. Explain that one Miss Alien Tila.... Yeah you can't you tard cunt.

Another good one Eduardo =) Keep it up.

Kris said...

Oh and no they aren't "Bare" crotch shots but still.... who they fuck wears teal panties with a black dress and then expects for her crotch to go un-noticed. That's what I'm saying. I still have to go carve my eyes out after looking at that shit.

goldenhum said...

i was JUST about to post what jayden said. pr.com is a site that anyone can post to, with any name. i know because unlike tila, i have my own record label and used this site in the beginning to send out our first press release. they do no reference checking whatsoever.

Seagal said...

Good call jayden!! I was just going to post , basically, what you did as I had heard about pr.com a while back. They just write what the"interviewee" wants them to. It's total bs.
But her little army will read it and be impressed not knowing or probably not caring that it is a "fluff' piece.

vicky said...

Question...when she says she has a "friend" who's a US ambassador, does she actually mean a "client" who pays for her services??

Pfft wtf am i going about? She's a $2 dollar St. Kilda corner working girl...her skanky ass couldn't get high profile clients like that HAHAHA

Isis said...

I'm pretty damn good at PR, and everything I do is gratis (spelling anyone? lol), which means I do it for free. I honestly thought about having PR be my major, but I prayed about it and I still thank God every day that I decided not to get that degree, it would have been a huge waste of money and I would be miserable right about now. I am so much happier doing it freelance.

Amelie said...

I used to be of the 'oh she's mentally ill, she needs help, not criticism' mindset, having suffered with mental illness myself in the past. However, I have run out of sympathy, especially with her narcissistic babblings and lack of remorse or any moral compass. She's become a modern day freakshow and I just can't get enough of her batshit crazy antics. Seriously, if this isn't updated everyday I get so disappointed, she's hilarious in a really frustrating and hateable way. I love the comment 'I said I'd become a mogul in 2010 and I've already achieved that' (not her exact words, but you get my drift). HOW EXACTLY ARE YOU A MOGUL TILA? Because you SAY you are and got a super serious haircut and appeared on FOX NEWS???? For fuck's sake. I'd also like to say that Eduardo Retardo, you're one of the funniest people ever and I quite love you.

deluwiel said...

"It's a double entendre"

"Right, right."

She has no idea what that means, does she? LOLOLOLOLOL

I guess being smart like an alien doesn't get you an A in vocabulary. Or French.

starfish said...

i used to work for this "fashion designer" but he was more of a faux sion designer (i know thats lame) seriously, he was able to get into newsweek magazine as the next face to watch, he was able to sham lots of people. im not saying tila is shamming like he was, but this guy is now in jail for rape BECAUSE HE WAS A RAPIST AND CON ARTIST! his name is anand jon...

anyways...he fooled ALOT of ppl in the industry...makes you think huh?

Lisa said...

OMG! I can hardly type. Been laughing so hard there are tears in my eyes! TEARS I SAY! I used to pray Tila would get help and stop this madness, but it's just too damn funny now! Thank you rotspot! Thank you!

boytoy said...

i havent read the post yet, but that's alot to read.

boytoy said...

boring article tila saying the same thing she's saying in every story.
I want something new and interesting where's this escort story you where going to write??

Starfish that fashion guy your talking about i was watching tht story on tv.

starfish said...

yes it was on 20/20. i got interviewed but then i didnt want to be on tv talking about what he did, but yes he is a very sleazy con-artist rapist. hes in jail now thank god

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