Blog Archive

Sunday, June 20

postheadericon Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the daddies (and the mommies in the daddy role) out there! But you know, no matter what you do, you'll never be as awesome as Tila's dad!

We all remember Tila recently talking about her father's involvement in the Vietnam war. You can read our post about it here. Here's a bit of a recap:
- Tila's dad is the son of her great-grandparents
- He left his sisters, ages 4 - 16, alone during the war
- He bribed the Viet Cong into letting him & Tila's brother onto a boat to America
- He left Tila's pregnant mother behind in Vietnam during the war


But you know what else? He's also a jailbird!

What a life!

The funny thing? There's a picture of Tila's mother, father, brother, and sister floating around. I'm not going to post it here because they didn't do anything wrong (except raise a lying tramp). But yeah, he's hardly "tatted up." He hardly looks like the kind of guy to have been in jail, or to get "some hoe's" face tattooed on him. Jesus Tila, you really couldn't be more of an embarrassment to them, could you? But you keep trying, don't you?

In any case, as we wish our dads a Happy Father's Day, what we really should be thanking them for is not raising us to be like Tila. Thanks, dad!


Pops said...

Ok, I'm dying to know where I can find this photo - or what keywords to search in google. Anyone?

Brixie said...

Hey gals, did you see her post today about hanging out with her dad? She said she doesn't get to see him much, so she was happy to spend time with him today. Um...don't her parents live in Texas or something?

I know she probably didn't even write the post - maybe it was even her sister. But whoever wrote it made it sound like it was Tila. And I think we all know she wasn't anywhere near her father today.

Fatty McFatterson said...

I hope despite having a daughter like Tila, her dad was able to enjoy the day with the children he's proud of.

deluwiel said...

I'm going with the alien theory - her "dad" was a probe of some kind. The poor family forced to take her in and raise her as a human were probably coerced and threatened by the Illuminati and those of Satan's blood line.

RIP dad. I miss you.

MsWonkyTits said...

Thank God they have a common last name. I'm sure her parents are absolutely mortified by her and try to keep quite quiet about her being thier daughter. I have seen a picture of her father as well and he most defintely is not a "tatted up jailbird".

Thanks for the reminder about her dad being her Great-Grandparent's son. LOLZ! That had be cracking up the day she posted that.

Marsh Hatah said...

I love this website and love the work you guys do. However, this comment perplexed me a little:

"He hardly looks like the kind of guy get "some hoe's" face tattooed on him"

What does a guy who gets tattoos look like? People from every walk of life, age, race, class etc get tattoos. I don't think you can tell from a photograph of someone whether they'd be interested in getting tattooed or not.

Just my two cents : )

(or my two penn'orth as we say in England lol)

The Gnome said...

Our beloved fatty fat didn't say he didn't seem like the guy to get tattoos...she said "he didn't seem like the type of guy to get some hos face on him" ie...a picture of some random broad he banged in a back ally embedded into his flesh...

hope that helps lol

ps- I myself am one tatted up individual :P

Fatty McFatterson said...

Hey Gnomey, it was Uncle Eddie who made the tat comment, not your beloved over here, lol.

I can't say whether or not her dad got tats or was in jail, all I know is it's completely disrespectful to bring it up on a public forum. If he did get tats and went to jail, that's his news to post, not hers. If he didn't do those things, it's a shitty thing to say about someone. The tat thing isn't the problem, it's the way she worded it, like he did something scandelous and hurtful to her mother. That's just wrong. And as her Army knows, Tila NEVER lies, so they took that one hook, line and sinker.

Anonymous said...

So I called Mr. Google and he told me where to go find her family's pics. No, it's not stuff posted by jelis haters, fans, or the paparazzi. Tila posted those herself.

From what I saw, her parents look like, for a lack of a better term, parents. Just that.

GhostofChunks said...

I know that this is not a Father's Day comment, but I just HAD to laugh at another one of the stories from their twisted family life trying to escape Vietnam during the war... twisted by Tila.

In the original version of that lovely crock o' shit of a story, she said that her mom was a really hot model at the beginning of the War in 1955. Say, she was about 20 at that time, born in 1935, that would make her about 75 right now if the story is true, which we all know it's not.

So how does out little not-so-bright hogul out herself in another lie about that story? She said in that Twitter convo that her mom is HOT at 52.

So, I'll take that as a truth, that she may/may not be hot at age 52.

That means, if she wrote that in 2010, then Tila's mom was born in 1958... 3 years AFTER the start of the Vietnam War, and she was probably quite the cute little model at the pre-embryonic phase of development in 1955. She wasn't even a follicle yet, waiting to be released. She was one hot little egg in her scrabbling around in her mother's ovary.

So, Tila, being a model yourself (cough*gag*cough), how do gauge attractiveness of partial genetic material? "Oh, look at THAT zona pellucida surrounding that ovum! Damn! She looks like she'd be a tough egg to crack! The sperm that penetrates that tough corona radiata is gonna be one lucky piece of genetic information because she's gonna be one hot zygote some day! I'll bet that she'll make the cover of 'Blastocyst Weekly'with all that cleavage going on!"

But since you have no idea of how sexual reproduction works on the cellular level, or even the duration of a typical human pregnancy, the as sure as hell you're not going to know how to judge the potential attractiveness of genetic material.

All this to say: FAIL AGAIN, TILA! You've been caught in a whole new lie.

*Cleavage in reproduction refers to cell division. Hope that makes some sense.