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Saturday, June 12

postheadericon Oh Valtrex, where are you??? Got the perfect place for you to advertise!


It seems like WhoreMeat put on her Big Mogul Underpants© and is looking for advertisers for her totally professional, legit blog. I guess Mr. Google didn't like Tila so much. Which, if you think about it, makes sense, because she never consults Mr. Google when she's weaving those preposterous lies to give them any hope of credibility (remember in the year late 1070 when her parents escaped VietNam with Tila just a wee little mogul tucked in her mama's uterus, 6 years before Tila was born?): 


As you can imagine,  I have a few issues with Tila's claims. I've worked in marketing for many years. Though I don't have a lot of ad experience, I certainly know a thing or two about how it works, and of course Miss Tila Fail is going about it completely wrong and lying, to boot.

You have as many views as major gossip blogs? Ummm. Well, let's look at YOUR site meter. I know, I know, it's not tracking in Real Time, but because it's attached to YOUR site, it's the source any legitimate advertiser will look to for facts:


Hmmmm. Now this doesn't look too good. You average only 17,000 views per day, and your visitors are spending less than a minute and a  half per visit. As an advertiser your low numbers and low retention rate would concern me. The most revealing number an advertiser would like to see is your unique visitors. If 16,000 of these hits are Mittie refreshing the page all day, then advertisers are not going to be too interested.

Now, lets look at your numbers over the last month. You claim in one month you've built this site up to the impressive viewers one would find on perezhilton.com or tmz.

Of course, advertisers will question you about what caused that curious spike in viewers on June 5, hoping you'd be able to replicate the numbers across the board.  Ohoh. I don't know if they'd be pleased to learn that this was the day of your SUICIDE HOAX. Any legit advertiser wouldn't suggest you replicate that disaster...I mean the liability they'd incur from LAPD, LAFD and Rescue, the EMT's, and whatever other resources were WASTED on that little stunt would pretty much bankrupt them.

But at least you have your comps for the last month. Advertisers will be interested in seeing just how much higher your viewership is over patsy-asses like Perez, tmx, radaronline, and for shits-and-giggles, I threw in your new best buds over at buzzfeed.com:


This is starting to remind me of that Where's Waldo book,....where's Tila's daily pageview ranking? Ohhhhhhhh wait, you see right there, on the very bottom, right on top of the black line outlining the graph, there's a hint of a blue line. Maybe you better zoom in a bit. There she is. Now, being a blonde, I've had my blonde moments, and I have enormous natural breastesses so I tend to do things ass-backwards, so I admit it may be that I loaded this image upside down, but you be the judge.

Hey look our pals buzzfeed.com, who I've never heard of before yesterday are doing a helluva lot better than Tila. No wonder she wanted to partner with them! Don't forget to look up in the sky and wave to Perez, he's flying high right up there with tmz. Isn't it cute how Perez and Harvey are just fighting it out for number 1. So cute.

Now I'm not a hotshot mogul or anything, but I'd say any advertiser who saw this proof, would be pretty damn crazy to pour money into anything connected with WhoreMeat.

But, I gotta go back to Tila's plea, cause the lol's are writing themselves in that pathetic piece of crap. Yep kids, it's your favorite part of the program Quote Recraps! YAY!!!
 With that said, I have and INCREDIBLE staff at my site and everyone who works on it behind the scene, I only picked out the top of the top, the best of the best!
Last week you were patting yourself on the back, while simultaneously looking for sympathy when you stated you've only had yourself and one person working night and day on the site.  I guess the other 18-28 staffers were too busy to copy edit, search out new and interesting stories, start the fun contests, conduct all those celebrity interviews, you know WORK!
right now there are a couple of big ad agencies that would like to work with me, but in the meanwhile, until I decide which company will be the best fit for mine, I am willing to offer anyone who wants to advertise on my site an EXTREMELY GOOD DEAL!
I can tell you with 100% confidence that there are no ad agencies, big or small, who want to work with you. If there were, they'd be a little pissed that you're undercutting them on the ad rates, and they'd want to have some control over what other advertisers were on your site. I mean, c'mon, do you really need a hair-pulling, drag-out fight between Massengil and Summer's Eve?

Advertisers put their money where they believe it will make the most sense (no pun intended, but damn, what an awesome pun!). They also want to showcase their product in the best possible light, so they're careful who they associate with. Believe me, the Center for Missing and Exploited Children, is going to have a really hard time placing an ad banner over a picture of your wonky tits and a plea for your minor viewers to send their contact info to you so you can fly them out to meet you.

it will be quite expensive to advertise here since we get so much traffic! It is just standard business numbers.
You just pull these gems out of your ass don't you? Standard business numbers? What the hell is that? If you're trying to say it's industry practice, again, you're wrong. Let me give you a moment so you can contact those powerful lawyers of which you have so you ask them what it means to lie to potential clients with the purpose of defrauding them. Yep. That's what we have here folks, Tila conspiring to defraud. Puffery is one thing, outright lying about your numbers and your success is another. Of course, Tila believes if she breaks out the belts and used tampons and puts on a little show for the advertisers, no one will think to look at her actual Real Time stats, of which she has.

My site has already costed me nearly $30,000 to build
That's Mogulese for "my site cost $15 bucks, but for me and my broke ass, it might as well be $30,000 because I have no prospects of finding paying work and no hope of ever being more than I am today".

Aside from my massive traffic on my site, the age demographic is from mostly 15-34 years old and 50/50 male and female. I am also currently speaking to big motion picture companies that want to be placed on the site as well.
You know Tila, you say you like to help folks, and I admire that. In that spirit, I'm going to help you by re-writing the above paragraph. Feel free to copy and paste, sweetie!:

Aside from my lackluster traffic on my site, the age demographic is mostly 12-15 years old and 50/50 school children and pedophiles. I am also currently speaking to the voices in my big head and they want to be placed on the site as well.
Tila, the professional I am, says that if you had all these potential advertising opportunities you claim, you wouldn't be begging on your site for sponsorship. The sponsors would be coming to you. That's how it works. Advertisers look at trends, at what's hot, and they glom onto that. If you have to compose a poorly written plea on your own blog to get them to notice you, you're not doing it right.

If I were you, I'd apologize to Mr. Google. He was your only hope.

Addendum: Big Mogul Underpants is hereby copyrighted. By me. With Tila putting together that fashion line, I need to protect myself when she needs a catchy name for her lingerie line.

I agree with many who think that all Tila's talk of the 'others', and the possibility they may shut down her site, and now her inability to attract advertisers, spells doom for her blog, and we may see her shutting the doors soon. It's obvious she's getting bored with it, and it was just a vehicle to legitimately bash celebs of whom she's jelis, and has recently devolved into a compilation of her graphic diarrhea. Bye bye Tila.

69 comments:

Snippy Bitch said...

Well researched, well written...

Fatty, I think I love you.

gigglingmonk said...

Hasn't she said multiple times that shes spent every dime she has on this site. So..she only had $30,000? Thats not a sum to laugh at by any means, especially in this economy, HOWEVER, did she claim on fox news(lullz) that she was in the 7 digits range? Hmm, thats odd, I'm only counting 5 digits in 30,000...well, maybe she meant $30,000.00? Yeah, I'm sure.

whatahautemess said...

"WIth that said" or "With that said, I have and INCREDIBLE staff..." Apparently that staff has "costed" much more than the major gossip blog is reeling in.

An age demographic of "mostly 15-34". No legitimate agency will touch that. It means as young as 8-10 up to 40-68.

K.R. Omen said...

Does she need a sit-down with Ari Gold, so she can learn how to bullshit a bullhitter? What kind of half-assed open letter was that? Oh Dr. Drew, please bring a tranq gun and save this idiot from herself. She can't wait another day.

maya said...

my standart business numbers say that tila is a meth-addicted whore who will do anything, and I REPEAT ANYTHING, for attention....
and my standart business numbers NEVER lie!ha
ps. i'm totally in love with the rotspot:)))*flashes eyelashes*

tillie said...

Fatty, I do love you. Thank You once again for the bestest posts ever! I can't wait for that skank to go down. I so look forward to the new posts here, I get all giddy with excitement to see what you awesome ladies call her out on next. Thanks for the entertainment!

goldenhum said...

this.

chey said...

wow, companies must be crazy not to take advantage of this great offer.
Because I too am nice, I have written up some tag lines for these companies to use.
Dr. Rey's Plastic Surgery - So your tits don't come out like Tila's
Honey-nut Cheerios - the first choice of methheads everywhere
LazyBoy - Our chairs won't cause mischairages
Ambien - For when you need to tweet all day and night.
Philippine Airlines - our coach seats will make you think you're in first class

You're welcome big companies.

deluwiel said...

Yup. I give it... oh, maybe another 10 days or 2 weeks. And I think I'm being generous.

BTW - I wish she'd find a new pet phrase. "With that said" is getting soooo old... and I think she broke her record by using it twice back to back in the first paragraph.

What sort of excuse do you think she'll have for the demise of OMG? Illuminati? Onyx ate her laptop? The nonstop 24-hour-a-day research, blogging, and contacting sources was just eating into her time developing new artists and ventures for her Moguldom? Stay tuned...

rockitqueen said...

Beautiful work yet again, Fatty. I used to work in marketing myself and laughed my fool head off at this pathetic, overblown plea. "I'm wildly popular and have ad agencies knocking themselves out of the way to work with me, but I'm going to offer YOU a cut rate cuz I'm humble and sweet and like to help people with their little ad agencies"...hilarious! "Costed"...HILARIOUS!

Actually, it would be pretty funny to do a collection to advertise TRS on her page and see what she does. Of course, none of us would throw any of our hard-earned welfare $$ in the Gremlin's direction, but it would be interesting to see just how desperate she is.

This past week has been deliciously satisfying. Watching her desperately cling any last shred of "fame" she has and try to claw her way to the top of her personal cesspool is wildly entertaining. Her delusions of grandeur would actually make a good Psych 101 paper for someone.

I honestly think she would kill for fame and attention. Hey, and most likely she already has...we still don't know all the details of Casey's death...

elisaannh said...

Oh please write something about her claim that her tila-army is now a religious cult out to fight the evil of this world. Her tweets are making me gag. She is now playing God in a G-string.

imoutofit said...

I think I've had my fair share of "With that said" to last me a whole life time. Now she's claiming on her twatter page that she's smart and is researching, googling, and looking up on wikipedia about "The Others". First of all, this turd has no common sense or street smarts. Her fail blog is proof that this queef needs to go back to school and get an edumacation. She needs to be enrolled in ESL; her Slutinese is her first language and she needs a better grasp of the English language to be a successful hogul in the industry.

apocryphalyou said...

Fatty this is a thing of beauty... just like an great surgeon, you tore her apart and put her together again, all her delusions and lies, like some sort of sweet sweet Frankenstein whore.

apocryphalyou said...

Please rotspot stand-by, another massive expose on Satan's government / pop-star army, with added quantum physics is coming at 1am pst.

Everyone "guard your lions," and brains, for another great weekend of lolery.

Vintage Pink said...

Quantum physics is her new field of study...

Anna said...

Just for the hell of it all, I went to Twitter to see what she was putting down an the latest (posted about an hour ago) was this...

"Ok boys and girls. Around 9am I will give you a PREVIEW of CHAPTER 2 about "THE OTHERS" for now, I must continue studying Quantum physics."

Quantum Physics?? WHAT???

gee said...

She should have had one of her brilliant "top of the best" staff writers pen this instead of doing it herself. Or used spell check, "costed"? Extreme overuse of "with that said"? Generally sounding like she has NO idea what she's talking about and providing NO real facts or numbers? MOGULFAIL!

Clementine said...

Does anyone remember a few weeks back in the comments someone mentioned that their work spent 20grand on their website? Which is totally a legit number for an outside company to come in and develop a site with flash and all sorts of bells and whistles. Looks like the slutball just added 10g to that number! Her site is hosted by Wordpress! Other than paying for her site name(average is 10-15bucks a year to secure and maybe she paid for a template that would be the total cost of her site. She steals all her photos so no cost there, she OBVIOUSLY doesnt even bother to use spellcheck before posting(fucking hell she doesnt even re-read her posts!) it was pretty easy to tell that while she was 5150 she there was maybe 9head filling in the posts every few hours with age old stolen stories.

As someone who DID work in an ad agency at one point I can back up Fatty in saying that ad agencies are not begging her to sign on. Neither are movie companies.
AND if they were they would name their price ie: we will give you 200 dollars a year to run this text ad on your site. Being it is so new and low numbers(which of course any account manager would want PROOF of from a reliable 3rd party source!) Her site is too new to even be a blip on anyones radar. Big companies advertise with Perez and TMZ because they have the hits, and have been around for more than a month!

Plus anyone reading her comments would see that the majority of them are negative towards her, that doesnt bode well for the future of a site. Along with the fact that a simple Google search on her antics would bring up how much of a sewer feeder she is no one would touch her with a 100 foot pole.

Standard business practice is for advertisers to approach her to place a small text ad for a short amount of time to see how many unique click throughs they got. Then they would see if it made sense to place bigger longer ads on her site.

Poor whore must be getting pretty desperate to have to beg on twitter and her own blog for anyone to advertise with her.

livvey said...

I'm sure advertisers will be falling all over themselves to be on a site that is written so well. That just screams demographics over 18. Her appalling grammar and the way she words things doesn't scream reputable job site.

I'm curious to all of her exclusives that were supposed to drive people to her site. She claimed to be a Hollywood insider for x number of years. You'd think she'd have more to offer than one interview with a boxer and her making unfounded claims against some d-list celebrities that had to be taken down quickly.

elisaannh said...

Just when I think she has exhausted all possible directions, her latest tweet is that she is off to study quantum physics so she can write about the OTHERS. I never knew she was so intelligent. I am shocked! Someone take her away.

Sammi said...

we may see her shutting the doors soon.

How awesome would that be!!!


& GREAT post Fatty ♥

Cybilseyes said...

LMAO with that said.. good job!

BKiddo said...

Just reading her opening line "Dear FELLOW Industry People and Advertising Compainies",
makes you want to see the looks on the faces of those lucky enough to receive such a note.
The ones that actually opened it, must be in utter hysterics.
I love the "If 16,000 of thease hits were Mittie hitting the refresh button all day" part.
My Dear Fatty, you've done it again, nice job!

Joann said...

"Aside from my lackluster traffic on my site, the age demographic is mostly 12-15 years old and 50/50 school children and pedophiles. I am also currently speaking to the voices in my big head and they want to be placed on the site as well."...pure gold Fatty.

Tila put the nails in the coffin with her pitch for advertisers. That pitch was wrong on so many, many levels.

You would think by having an INCREDIBLE staff she would have an ad writer on board to write this for her...the problem is she has no staff.

I hope Rob think long and hard before he put his career in her hands.

kristi said...

I almost feel like writing a post about what she did wrong in that 'copy', but I don't think that I want to give her any ideas on how to make it better. I might still do it anyway. Maybe her drug induced writing will improve and at the same time give me something to do on a really boring Sunday.

Great post as always Fatty!

RC3199 said...

Tila has obviously had herself a drug induced epiphany since her recent visit from the police.

She now has designated herself as an “Angel” sent to earth by God to help us mere mortals fight against the devil and his followers.

Her rant then changes focus to conspiracy theories about “The Illuminati” and “The Others”.

But has the STD ridden troll truly gone off the deep end or is there a true method to her madness.

Personally I feel that she has realized her days of people buying into her BS are over.

Let us review the facts:

1. With the help of this site and many others she has been exposed as a habitual liar whether it be imaginary pregnancies/miscarriages, fake charities, record labels, gossip blogs, and numerous other failed business ventures.

2. Her one real opportunity to make any money or extend her 15 seconds of fame (CR4) dried up when they announced that they were cancelling/delaying the show because they could not book a big enough z-list star for this season. Basically, they flat out bitch slapped her into reality by telling her she does not even rate as a z-list star and nobody would tune in as she could not carry the show.

3. Her gossip blog is a charade and has no value now nor will it ever be a money making proposition.
The desperate plea trying to sell ads is the final curtain call for her site and I am sure it will disappear in the very near future


With all that has gone wrong for her lately she figures the crazy rants will help foster more interest in her if and when she does appear on CR.

She can then claim that her drug use (and not the lack of any real talent) has drained all her resources and she is dead broke and she does not have the “Mad $$$$” that she loves to claim daily.

Should the opportunity to do CR dry up she still has an out when her imaginary empire crumbles because she can just blame it on “The Illuminati” and “The Others”.

It’s time for this bitch to clean off the coke glazed mirror and take a long hard look at what she has become.

Jacqui said...

I think she knows she's getting thrown in the looney bin so she's preparing the story for her "army." Obama, Illuminati King himself, is going to come to her apartmansion with Dick Cheney, bloodline to Satan (they're actually bff in the YMCA Illuminati Club) who will shoot her in the face with a shotgun (because he can do that),only to miss when she defends herself with her north-pointing nipple, so they force her to watch Taylor Swift (YOU BITCH I THOUGHT YOU LOVED JESUS) music videos until her brain drips out of her ears. Then Dan Brown will publish it and everyone will be misinformed and walk around talking like they know everything about Leonardo Da Vinci, and his mogul grandaughter from 1070 or 1981, Tila Fucking Tequila.

Can we please get her institutionalized? It's starting to make me vom when I read anything she has to say... but I can't help it... she's just so CRAZY.

Seagal said...

My sister does own an ad agency and I pointed her towards Tilas site. Hated giving Tila a hit but this was business :). After I had to pick her up off the floor and calm her hysterical laughter with *a couple of valiums and a stiff drink she was able to compose herself and say that NO agency would even touch that site. It isn't cost effective no matter how cheap. It could possibly ruin the rep of any product being advertised. Also the number of hits and time ppl spend on the site is not a good sign either. The ppl that post on the site are obviously not "product purchasers". Most appear to be children(under 18) The site is too new to risk it. But the fact is, as my dear sister put it, The girl is completely and utterly whacked out of her mind and any agency that would be stupid enough to chain themselves to her deserves what they would get, which would be $0.00 and a shot rep.
*I really didn't give her a couple of valiums and a stiff drink. I took them ;)KIDDING.

Alabama Worley said...

Her site DID NOT cost 30K. She paid a graphic designer (carlton) she paid for the LLC and domain. Cost? 12,000

I'm running late for an appointment or I'd share more because I cannot bite my tongue any further so "with that said" here's the deal:

1. She has an agent that gets 20% of her earnings

2. She pays 3,500 for her mgmnt company. That's per month. They do all her touring and gigs, she just shows up. She's notorious for not marketing herself anymore in a positive light which is why people are dropping her like a bad habit. She makes it really hard to represent or be next to and decent people still want to be signed or aligned with her. (hope that makes sense)

3. She does NOT have a publicist and she does NOT pay her staff. They are on a barter. 9head should get his own site or take hers over and change the domain because he can write and is wittier than Perez. Although one has to question why he dresses Tila in such a horrid fashion when his comments on others are dead on.

I'm not going into how I know this but- I know this. Bitch is a broke liar. I'd love to go "in" but I risk losing a lot that's getting better in my life day by day and a boyfriend she'd kill to have. I really do think she'd kill to date him, no lie. Oh her personally?

Facts:
She cannot do *porn* unless it's a boyfriend or a significant other(s) and they sign off that they are fully aware of her diseases and drug use - because she has herpes, hpv and is considered high risk due to drug use. She is not able to be AIM tested and picked up to work with partners without rubbers (the porn that sells) because of everything I listed above. Now you can work with herp and hpv but NOT Hep C or be a known IV drug user.

Fuck her.

Ps: I have PMS and someone just pissed me off so I just let go. felt good. Now to go do what I need to be doing.

jayden said...

The time has come to begin the official tilaomfail.com fold date betting pool.

Joann said...

Liked your comment Seagal.

I really believe the skank knew her gossip site was going down the tubes some time ago and needed someone to blame.

We know she will NEVER admit to anything being her fault so this may be the reason why she's coming up with these Illuminati and Others posts.

She says in her post:

"“THE OTHERS” can kill you for in order to shut you up! And if they can’t KILL YOU because it would be too obvious, they have other ways to shut you up, especially if you’re a celebrity or someone who has a big following and influence. That means I am putting myself in risk for they are watching me, but I don’t care"

Nobody is watching this nitwit. When her gossip site shuts down she will say the the Illuminati and the Others were behind it because she "exposed" them.

Lady Luck said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lady Luck said...

This is my first time commenting, but I've been reading since the week the blog started.

It only gets better and better with time. Tila, you are officially batshit crazy and I cannot wait to see you ultimately go down in flames. Hopefully it's behind bars where you will be someone's bitch for a little while.

Mark said...

@elisaannh "Oh please write something about her claim that her tila-army is now a religious cult out to fight the evil of this world"

I'll second that! This is the first time I have ever actually heard her claim that she's started a "religion". A chance to have a go at that is just too good of an opportunity to miss! She tweeted something about having studied quantum physics for 7 years too. Incredible stuff!

I would nominate Uncle Eddie to write that particular article, but Rotty would serve up a beauity too.

Damien_Charon said...

My crystal ball predicts (between snorts of gut-splitting laughter) that she'll continue to get her army all worked up with this war against satan crap.

Then, when she claims she's about to reveal the most secret of all unholy secrets that the "Others" don't want them to know about, her site will go down and her twitter will mysteriously fall silent.

As the droolers panic and cling to the edge of their booster seats, she'll sit back and wait for the right moment.

After reappearing with another puff of drama, she'll fill their wittle-bitty heads with the horrid details about how she'd been captured and had to fight for her life (using her super-duper angel powers) to break free from the clutches of evil so she could save her cherished army from the same dark fate.

They'll eat it up and worship her as their new messiah.

livvey said...

I wonder what she would do if she was approached by this site to advertise on her site.

gillianthemad1013 said...

Tila is now claiming that she has been studying Quantum Physics for 7 years. LOL FOREVER.

Joann said...

While we wait with anticipation..*rolling eyes*..for Tila, or as she now calling herself, Commander in Chief, latest psycho babble rant on The Others I ran across this article about her behavior after Casey Johnson died.

http://www.fashion.ie/aggregator/gossip/236685-tila-tequila-clearly-grieving-casey-johnson-sociopath

IMO, Tila is definitely a sociopath.

Sammi said...

HAHA @ Livvey that would be a good one, you guys should right up a fake propsal for her! LOL!! Also she is claiming now ( I am guessing she WOKE UP ) that she found a RAT in her ARMY and is deleting all RATS!

Who got deleted?!? - I bet it was NO ONE, HAHA!

Sammi said...

@Damien I BELIEVE that is exactly what she is planning on doing!! :) She appears to have woken up & is telling her "ARMY" to prepare for her next blog it is their "SUNDAY SERMON".

- I refuse to load her blog so I hope you guys are ready, lol! :D

goldenhum said...

alabama's post is going to delight tila to no end. :)

apocryphalyou said...

In 3...2...1... she's going to come out with this:

<a href="http://www.emhdf.com/monarch.htm>http://www.emhdf.com/monarch.htm</a>

And how the satanic bloodlines and the government as part of a top-secret project gave her DID, and yes rotspot and the other readers are totally correct in that this downward spiral will lead to the end of her blog-pocalypse, as she will run into hiding from those powerful entities that had fractured her so long ago.

If even 1 or 2 of her true army members (aka -- teens looking for acceptance, any acceptance)believes this crock, fears for her life... because really self-induced other personality attacks are way totally different than a bunch of hollywood execs from the Temple of Set banging down your door, with Rhianna jamming a chloroform soaked rag in your mouth, then threatening to take your 30k millionaire blog away if you don't stop talking smack about these satanist bitches... that's like totally different.

If one kid flips out and does something stupid, something harmful over her self-delusional and grandiose actions, that's just -- ahh, that bitch doesn't understand that stirring the pot and setting it to boil, will do something -- oh wait, yes she does, and she uses it.

Perhaps 99% of her 4 person army is there for the Schadenfreude, but one might actually believe it's raining outside when she's pissing all over them.

I saw some drama-whore psychopaths on livejournal before, fake deaths, fake pregnancies, fake diseases, even DID -- but really, the whole satanic mind-control government thing just -- wow.

I understand that a lot of folks really believe she's using heavily, and I don't doubt it for one bit -- but I do believe she's well aware of her actions, conniving, and doesn't care about anyone but herself. A true addict, whether its the pills or her ego, it all ends the same way.

That's why I'm glad rotspot is here, not only to call her out, but to make others aware, and keep her ass to the fire.

Ben said...

Just an idea, have you guys ever thought of setting up a StuporGirl twitter account? Similar to the ones for the Glee characters. It's a hilarious way to mock Tila's posts on twitter as they happen.

Just a suggestion.

Joann said...

LOL...Tila tweeted this about 2 hours ago... "URGENT: #TilaArmy There has been a "RED ALERT" set off so I have to meet up w/my West Coast Tila Army General & East Coast to deal with this about 2 hours ago via web".

I've never seen the mind of a sociopath in action before.

Is she setting the stage for her kidnapping by The Others??

Eduardo Retardo said...

Ben, the artist that does Stupor Girl (contrary to popular belief, she isn't one of the writers here) has a twitter:
http://twitter.com/stuporGIRRRL

She just doesn't check it that often, but go ahead and add her if you want to!

suz said...

demographic??? Is it REALLY this easy to make fun of you???? and I'm on my 3rd 12 pack of Pacifico today....WOW! jackass

Alabama Worley said...

I bet Tila's red alert is me. Not to be a total ego maniac but something set her off ;)

K.R. Omen said...

I went to Nikki Raney's vid on Youtube and am currently going to war with one of her soldiers. LMBAO. Here is an excerpt.

"pretty sure it wont get thrown back in our face! um she has the number 1 blog atm, so number one means its the most popularest, so some how i dont think popular stuff goes under. just sumn 2 think about!"

Popularest is a new one to add to the TilaArmy vocab list.

K.R. Omen said...

BTW, here's the full argument at Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XzQso7a9K90

Feel welcome to join in. LOL

Alabama Worley said...

I just - for the first time ever - read the #Tilaarmy thing on twitter. Holy shit balls! These people are fucking lunatics!

Preparing to not sleep to wait to read what Tila has to say?

Meetings?

People saying (and I believe meaning it too) they'd die if she died.

I have entertained myself with her bullshit, and like her well known followers but I've never read up on her followers.

This is just fucking weird! I wish I could say something a bit more put together than that but in all honesty it's weird on a level I cannot comprehend.

Some of these are adults and women, yet they behave like this?!?!

Sorry, I can't wrap my head around this process. What on earth would make someone admire her? I say that with total and complete sincerity. I'm not trying to be snide or a cunt for once. What is there to even find appealing, sexy or smart? What the fuck do these people see as respectful or at least "cool"? I honest to god do not get it.

Joann said...

Alabama, I watching this whole crazy mess go down on twitter now.

The minors and young unstable adults are completely captivated by Tila. One thing she has is the ability to manipulate people, especially the ones who are immature, emotionally needy and naive.

She runs a con game on them to make them think she cares and they eat it up.

It's sad to say but they are lost at this point as you can tell by reading their tweets.

The saps are all "praying" for Tila now.

She's using them for whatever she is planning. Nothing has happen to her.

She's at home right now typing those crazy tweets to get them even more riled up and making them think something might or could have happened to her to see how far they will go for her.

The really sad part about this is she doesn't care about any of them and I think some of them will die for her. Now, that's scary.

Sheriff Gauncent said...

Just to let you all know that I just got back from urgent care. No care there available. I have to go to the emergency room right now. They didn't have the equipment there to tell me what was going on. Later!

Mark said...

LOL, this religious thing she's come up with is freakin awesome!

We'll have to start referring to her as:

"L. Ron Tequila"

BKiddo said...

Alabama,
What strikes me as odd, is that when I was a tween, there was no way that I would let anyone delegate what I should do. If someone, idol or not, told me that I had to wake their dumbass up, I'd tell them to sit and spin.
Hell, none of us would.
I don't get it either.

Damien_Charon said...

Yep...just like I predicted earlier today, here comes the drama.

According to her twitter from a couple of hours ago, she's now in "RED ALERT" stage because "some urgent shit just went down." She's telling her army to pray for her.

Now will come the mysterious silence on her twitter while they all flail and freak like good little cult members until she returns with an amazing tale of her furious battle with the dark lord of Honeynut Cheerios and Redbull induced psychosis.

Fatty McFatterson said...

She's been gone for several hours. She said this afternoon she was putting up a youtube, but she hasn't. She has her army in a teezy. But we all know she's doing that for the drama. Nothing has happened to her, she just likes the build up and to see who 'cares' enough to stay up all night. She will return and likely not give an explanation for her absence, or make up some fantastical bullshit.
She plays these people like this every day in some form, the whole 'who wants to see this blog? i'll post it in 5 minutes if you tweet you want to see it". This is her way of getting validation, and it's sick. Some of those fans are really scared.
Or, this could be a big setup by Tila when she had her secret 'general' meeting, to let us Rotspotters think there's a problem, and they can all be in at the joke, acting worried when they know perfectly well she's fine.
Either way, the manipulative ho is going to manipulate the wrong kid someday, and then we'll see heads roll.

kristi said...

So when is she going to start talking about the island she's on, and how the Dharma Initiative is trying to get her because her uterus is so powerful she can get pregnant anywhere?

Well, Ben if this is true, make sure you keep her in a vault or something with no chairs because she seems to get attacked by them and lose her miracle baby/babies.

With how crazy all this crap is, I now feel how Tila feels in an average day. I'll only hope that I don't wake up to news that she's OD'd and her little lemmings have followed her off the cliff.

Fatty McFatterson said...

a few hours ago tila promised her army that she'd have chapter 2 of the others blog. she says it's 'must see'. Who wants to bet the others hacked into her computer and deleted the chapter before she could post it?

Clementine said...

brb blogging now at www.MissTilaOMg.com & Remember Soldiers. DO NOT RESPOND TO HATERS. THEY ARE VICTIMS OF GOVERNMENT BRAINWASH ALREADY.


From her Twitter an hour ago...

Seriously wtf is she on? Is this also for "entertainment"?
Next thing she's going to be standing outside of Micheal Jacksons house claiming she was married to him and that she's the mother of his children.
or demand her army make tinfoil hats.

I'm guessing this is all a funny little drug induced game to see how many of her "army" will do what she says. She's most likely smoking her pipe and whispering "they love me, they really love me." For her this is all about validation that she is liked and being like = being famous and being famous = being powerful.

She's so transparent it's pathetic.

Banshie Armor said...

It appears that her newest army member is MIA.. Twitter is gone & video is deleted: http://misstilaomg.com/2010/06/14/tila-army-growing-stronger-worldwide-welcome-raichee/#more-10591

Ben said...

The "red alert" that went down is she probably realized she had popped her last pill and had to go score some more.

Anyone else catch that she has claimed to pay over $400k in taxes?

Isis said...

@Sheriff:

Good luck: I hope it isn't a hernia! =/

Ben said...

Sorry, it just blows my mind how Tila can say anything without proof and her army eats that shit up.

# @calleyalizabeth trust me I already got one in jail. I just didn't wanna put it out in the news cuz it is serious. But 1 is put in jail now

# Trust me #TilaArmy,I on this case Since beginning of this year. There is a certain group that will be exposed soon & filed restraining order 7 minutes ago via web

# As a matter of fact 1 of haters already went 2 jail for luring a 12 year old 2 talk 2 me & try 2 make me a bad guy. 2 others R SEX OFFENDERS

She will never post proof of any of this and the army will think they have won. BTW she's changed Army Rule #1 already and addressed haters, violating her own rule. Bitch just needs to be locked up.

Alabama Worley said...

To those who replied with comment to me, I agree no one (when I was growing up) could have caused me to behave like this.

I've been on the other side, where fans have acted outright bizarre to the point of scary and I hate to say it but it's this generation. It seems as though having everything and every moment accessible to people makes them feel entitled, in your life as much as your best friend and family as well as close to you. It's even more strange when adults do it but with adults I always tend to think it's a sign of depression and co-dependency.

Maybe this is a generation of co-dependent teens and young adults (my generation was the latch key of course)?

Either way she's fucking evil and if I didn't worry about being annoyed by minions attacking my email and such then I'd out her ass.

deluwiel said...

Creating this little fantasy is the only way... i mean THE ONLY way she can cling onto any kind of validation or feel relevant. At some point (very soon - a 14-year-old's attention span is only so long) the members of her "Army" are going to grow up and realize how idiotic this all is; certainly she's attracting no new fans. It's just a matter of time and natural attrition that her "Army" will disappear. In the meantime, I'm just enjoying the heck out of the lunacy.

jayden said...

Gotta love how easy those online restraining orders are to get! Remember when she filed one against Casa mid-flight? The Court of Crazy is now in session and Chief Justice Twatquila is presiding.

Julie Cornewell said...

Seriously impressive post. I think you need to some PR work on the side. I'm still probably on your shitlist but I gotta give credit where credit is due. Actually the whole website is pretty damn funny. Yeah, yeah I'm eating a big ol' heap of humble pie. Rub it in my face all you want.

trollwedding said...

I love how she said she has "lackluster traffic". That means "shitty ass traffic". Tila needs a thesaurus, but needs a lot of other things first! Valtrex, lithium, and a padded room come first. But a thesaurus really would help.

MsWonkyTits said...

I give that Flog one more month. Tops. I doubt ANY advertiser would ever pay a cent to be featured on that stupid, self centered, misspelled piece of garbage site. I'm SO glad you screen cap all of it for us so I dont have to give that shit site one more hit.
Her only hope is a TRS ad. She's so dumb she might even do it for 2 dollars, a box a tampons, 6 Ambien and a case of Red Bull. Oh, and maybe a pack of smokes. It might to be 200 packs, though considering that what's she smokes a day with her 5 million dollar habit. Stinky whore!

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