- Another day...another day of jelis hatin'
- New Stuporgirl!
- Update on US, your loyal Rotspot writers
- SURPRISE!!! Tila's still a dirty rotten lying piec...
- RIP Michael Jackson
- Tila's biggest fans react
- Tila admits fake suicide attempt
- UMA's say what?
- New Stuporgirl!
- Tila is a classy, fashionable broad.
- CALL 911 WE NEED THE FASHION POLICE!
- Father's Day
- What happened to Tila's Facebook page?
- Road Side Bomb
- Special Pets
- EXCLUSIVE!!!!! Tila FINALLY Tells the Truth!!!
- Hot Ass Messes of the Week
- Mushy Bullshit Makes Me Barf
- New Stuporgirl!
- Witchcraft, devils, & haunted houses?
- Perez Perez Perez
- Anything for Attention
- Video killed the OMG Star!
- Hey, it's crack o'clock!
- It's a sign!
- GUEST POST: Addressing Tila's "Open Letter"
- LIAR LIAR, WHORE ON FIRE!!!
- Crazy - Part Deux
- Oh Valtrex, where are you??? Got the perfect place...
- Calling All Advertisers
- EXCLUSIVE!!! Tila wins. She's added a bunch of new...
- Conspiracy theory, or stolen idea...you decide..
- What do you get when you mix...
- MOST EPIC BIOGRAPHY EVER!!!
- For Your Entertainment..
- Tila's "Wigging" Out!!
- Stream of Consciousness
- Listen up Tila's Army and other supporters!
- Why don't Tila's Ads Load Properly?
- YAY!!!! She FINALLY hit 1 million visits!!
- I'm confused....
- Whore Paint
- New Stuporgirl!
- Attack of the Artards
- Anatomy of a "STALKER"
- Haaaiiii from jail!
- Tila's Going To Sue Me...HA!
- She's baaaaaaaaaaaack....
- Silence is bliss ...
- Suicide Hoax
- AHA!!!! It wasn't suicide it was MOGULCIDE!!!
- Jelis Haterz Care More About Tila Than Her Army: T...
- LAPD Chase
- "Janes" Failure....
- The Mogul-tard does it again...
- You've gotta be shitting me.
- Speaking of dethroning...
- Who's dethroning who!?!?
- Tila Tequila drinking game!
- Somaya Reece goes INNNN on Tila
- New Stuporgirl!
- Update on CR and Tila
- ▼ June 2010 (64)
Friday, June 11
12:22 AM | Posted by Fatty McFatterson
Oh my God!!!! I haven't seen this much deliciousness since the ice cream truck blew a tire in front of my house! Put down those Pepsis, I'm not responsible for your computer monitors this time!! Break open your guvment cheese and invite your pedo neighbors over, we're going to have a rollicking good time!
So, in a desperate bid to get us to shut up about the SUICIDE HOAX of last weekend, Tila figures she'll force us to feel guilty about her sad, tragic life, and perhaps we'll think twice about mocking her for all she's been through. NOT!!!! Hahahhahahahahahaa. Please bitch. Now, I honest-to-God made these screen caps of her latest blog post about her autobiography. There is NO way I could have made any of this up. I urge you not to go to her blog, you HAVE to believe me when I say this is unretouched. Get ready my little toothless friends and neighbors...here's part 1 of Tila's bio. My comments follow.
Late 1070? (hahahhahah, she just changed it to 1970's). Jesus H. Christ, how can you even remember that far back. Ok, we all make typos, so I won't quibble, but it is funny, especially when she says "it sounds like this happened centuries ago", hahahahaha, yeah 1070 certainly was centuries ago.
You're Viet-Fucking-Namese. You have no clue when the Vietnamese War ended? Well, kiddies, even though Rotty, Uncle Eddie, Gnomie and I were those big-haired, gum-smacking, off-the-shoulder-halter-top-wearing girls who sat in the back of the class and rolled our eyes and flipped our hair every 3 minutes, we did pay close attention to History class...moreso because Mr. Larsen had a HUGE package and those skin tight disco pants accentuated it to perfection.
The Vietnam War started November 1, 1955 and ended April 30, 1975. Tila was born October 24, 1981, a full 6 years AFTER the war ended. For Tila to have been in her mother's womb, it would have had to be mid-1981, unless the gestational period for moguls is 75 months. Tila has proven before that she has no clue what the gestational period for a human is, just a few months ago she claimed her baby would be born, plus or minus 10 days, on December 1, 2010, after she became pregnant in November of 2009.
Some lol quotes for you to enjoy:
So that left my Father as the “MAN OF THE HOUSE” with his 7 baby sisters, who are all my Aunt’s.Really Tila? Your aunts? Of course they're your aunts you moron, that's what happens when your dad has sisters. Guess what if your mom has sisters, they're your aunts too!!!! Funny how that works, huh?
I read some comments over at her blog and someone pointed out this one:
save the love of his life, My Mother. At that time she had my little sister already and was pregnant with me.You mom had your little sister, BEFORE she has you? Damn. That agent orange really took it's toll on biology.
little do people know or realize, I am a child of WAR.Ummmm. Stupid? Yes, that's your new name, it went from an adjective to a proper name after I read this piece of horse shit! Stupid, if your definition of 'war' is that your family was affected by war years before your birth, most of us are CHILDREN OF WAR in some fashion. My parents grew up with World War II raging around them, my father escaped to this country after the war. I have friends who have numbers tattooed on their forearms (and not because they're leading their army of idiots on a rampage of hater sites). I have family members who not only fought, but FUCKING DIED. My uncle fought in the Vietman War, he DIED so you could spin the war to bring sympathy to yourself. Stupid cunt. I won't even go into what my mother-in-law went through.
Hold on my little jelis haters, this guvment cheese ain't cutting itself, and without a tooth in my head, I need a timeout to run the blender a minute.
So, let's continue..... damn, wait another sec. I have to fetch a glass of Kool-Aid for Rotty, she's sitting up there on the washing machine on the side porch, banging her heels against the rusty sides, not able to get her fat ass off by herself.
For instance for the African Americans. The Slave law was lifted long long ago, but for me, I am still 2nd generation from the Vietnam War!
There are many MANY 2nd generation African Americans whose parents did not enjoy the freedoms they fought for their own offspring. Again, Tila, big fail points in trying to make yourself some tragic historical hero. You, yourself, lived in a southern state, tell me, how's those equal rights doing down there? Yeah, I thought so.
My mother was an extremely BEAUTIFUL woman when she was younger. Before the War, she was actually a beautiful Model in Vietnam and was about to star in a big Movie there… that is until the WAR happened.
Hold on. I'm sorry. The junkyard dogs we have sleeping under the porch just woke up and I gotta throw them some neck bones and side meat. Tila, your beautiful mother of which you have had to have been a beautiful model back in 1955, because that's when the war started. I guess we can all see being a big liar whore-pants runs in the family. Doesn't skip a generation, does it? And she was up for a movie part? Damn, you and momma have quite the parallel lives don't you? I didn't know they had Whore Rehab back in those days. Did she have record label and a fashion line as well?
Oh what a beautiful story and there is a LOT more to come…. because once on the boat coming to America, A LOT of strange things happened and my Mother almost lost me in a miscarriage because there was no clean water, nor food. So you see, even BEFORE I was Born, I had to fight for my life, to stay a live even as a baby in my mother’s Womb…….. and then one day…………….If you're on a boat to America, your mom must have pulled the little string to ding the bell for the next stop in Singapore, cause that's where Tila claims to have been born.
And, there we see, in black and white the mischairage forshadowing because that poor 75 month old fetus, Tila, almost DIED in utero.
Also, you claim your heritage is French and Vietnamese. You have a Vietnamese surname, so that tells me your mom was French. Why couldn't she just fly out with her babies? No one would have stopped her, she didn't have to escape from anything.
Oh. So, so tragic. Hold on, I'm crying. I mean big huge old tears, so many tears I had to get Uncle Eddie to run down to the Shell station on the corner to get me some toilet paper from our second bathroom. If you could see Gnomie now, sobbing her little heart out on the shoulder of one of the pedos, you would realize that we're not all bad. We do have hearts. We wish we could erase this horrific story from Tila's memory. That poor dear, no wonder she has so many problems. The burdens of this horror have laid upon her shoulders all these years. I'm sorry Tila, this is the most heartbreaking
fairy tale biography I have ever read. You should write out the whole book, and go on Oprah to talk about it. Oprah only takes on legitimate authors, and your black history angle, will have her hooked. I hear that A Million Little Pieces book flew off the shelves after the author presented it on Oprah.
Who wants to bet that the next cracked out idea in that stupid mogul brain is that she's going to write her memoirs?