- Happy One Month Anniversary WhoreMeat!
- Wow. Just wow.
- Cuntzilla Misses the Point Of Memorial Day
- Innate Ugly=Tila Nguyen
- Fatty: One-eleventy-billion, Tila: big fat ZERO!!!...
- Fail Blog Sinks - Whole New Low
- They're juss JELIS!!
- Tila Continues Giving Advice...Sort Of
- New Stuporgirl!
- Fashion Tip 101
- Could Tila have taken us for a ride?
- A is for ...
- Meet Caroline...
- I put a spell on yoooouu...
- EXCLUSIVE!!! It's Perez's Party, Tila Will Lie If ...
- Tila's Fancy New Reality Show
- Tila's blog is super up to date on gossip!
- Dear Diary, Tila takes a hostage!!
- While we're on dresses ....
- EXCLUSIVE!!!! Tila's Maxim Party Dress STOLEN 2 mo...
- OMG a million views!
- About suing bloggers....
- Yay for Wednesday!
- Perez Hilton Buyout Negotiations?!
- Tila's too stupid to attempt a "Play on Words"
- The Dummies Guide to Speaking Slutinese
- Dear Fatty's Diary
- Exclusive! Which Z-List Celebrity is a Terrible Bl...
- Dating advice or The Makings of a Cheap Porn?
- Oh oh!!! For reals!!! I'm scared!! Hold me Uncle E...
- Oh, it's a very happy Sunday morning in my neighbo...
- Alright Listen Up....
- No Stuporgirl this Wednesday!?!?
- Amber Rose gets burned and the Rotspot gets banned...
- More from Tila's Conga Room Performance
- Lady CaCa
- Kimora Lee Simmons and Tila
- What we know of the Conga Room so far
- Hey Everybody! It's Tila's Anniversary!
- Tila can't be THIS delusional? Can she? She puts t...
- Midget Idjit Tour is a raging success!!!
- Uh oh, somebody's a liar!
- Tila on KTLA
- Here is some random stuff
- Tila's World-Renown Midget Idjit Tour!!!
- Tila's amazing EP! 3 whole songs!
- The World Weeps as Tila Continues to Assault our E...
- Tila loves the Rotspot!
- Finally, something not about the fail blog!
- More people angry at Tila for her fail blog
- Copy and Paste do not a gossip blog make
- Picture Gallery
- Whoo! Crack Rants!
- A is for ...
- Tila doesn't do drugs? I beg to differ!
- "I don't do drugs" ----Pfft Tila, you're a retard
- Tila's blog continues to be a big fat fail...
- More fun with Tila's blog!
- Story Time, Folks!
- New Stuporgirl!
- Media Talent Group: Stephen Dorff
- Let's talk about this "charity" ONE LAST TIME!!!!
- Oh yeah, Perez should be REALLY scared.
- Okay, you wanna talk about sucking dick at 16?
- More Lindsay Lohan stuff
- We loves TheHollywoodGossip.com
- A geography lesson
- ▼ May 2010 (69)
Wednesday, May 19
8:02 AM | Posted by Fatty McFatterson
One of the many things that perplex me about Tila is the fact she seems to speak a different language than the ‘jelis haters’. The Army of Morons and Halfwits seem to speak and understand her, but us jelis haters don’t seem to have a grasp of the mother tongue. So, I’m sitting here, butt naked, wolfing down pizza and talking nasty to the neighbor kids, ‘hey there Skippy, wanna see my boobies? C’mon on over and I’ll drag them off the ground for ya…you know you wanna see them!” I digress…anyway, so now I’m in the mood, so to speak, and realize that Tila’s native tongue, Slutinese, is actually not too difficult to learn when you’re acting a slut. So, here is a rudimentary Tila Slutinese Dictionary. This may help us make sense of the midget idjit mogul’s ramblings! I’ll add to it later, if there’s interest!
CHAIRity: Collecting money illegally for a fake cause because you’re so damn broke you can’t even afford a 13Head, you had to go for the more compact 9Head model
EXCLUSIVE!!!: the first mogul to copy and paste content in its entirety from a legit or even non-legit news source.
Jelis Hater: A well-informed person with a grasp of critical thinking skills and a sense of moral outrage
Kardashian sisters: Three sisters who are known for little more than their reality show, but who manage to be mega famous and extraordinarily successful in their individual endeavors
MisCHAIRage: A bi-annual event where you milk a fake pregnancy for as many months as you think you can get away with, only for it to end in a bloodless, painless tragedy that clears up faster than a zit on your ass cheek
Mogul: a person who promises many things, and delivers none (see poser, faker, liar, jelis bitch)
Piggy Perez: One of the most successful celebrity gossip bloggers. Still not “dethrowned”.
POW: An exclamation ending every inane thought that emanates from Tila’s pointy noggin
Rape: a fun activity to do to your partner while he sleeps
Tila’s Army: a rogue’s gallery of mis-fits, teeny-boppers and perverted old men, who dismiss any evidence of Tila’s illegal activities and wrong-doings for the chance to someday design fashions, or work on her record label, or travel the world with her. Their motto is: why you be hatin’ on Tila you is all pethedic and jelis and you don’t have a life